It's a trek back to the shrine, though Niamh doesn't have to go alone. Currently she's got corvid company, the tengu Taakiko whom helped rescue her from her be-dogged parents back at the inn. It's a good hour or two by foot, but soon Niamh is climbing the stairs up to the Inari shrine. Taakiko is in her wake and quite off to the side of the stairs. "The center is for the Gods," the bird-headed creature reminds kindly as they ascend. Compared to the inn, nothing is out of place and the air feels tranquil as it always has. Adding to that is the lazing large fox-thing sleeping where he straddles the Torii gate ahead, limbs dangling over each side.
Niamh stops before the gate, and struggles to keep her calm and not just break down then and there. "Noboru.." she starts to say, and her voice catches. She has to take more deep breathes, before she can continue. "Please save my parents," she finally manages.
"Mm," Noboru comments, and the tone doesn't sound as one who just woke up. "So, it is as I suspected it would be?" he continues on and one eye opens. It flicks between the tengu and Niamh. "It is," Taakiko agrees and bobs its corvid head. "There is still time before separation won't be possible, but something will need to be done soon." So, Noboru slips off the Torii gate and lands on all fours without a sound. "Petition your elder to loan me the soul-cutting blade, then. I will need it. And, since you have seen it firsthand, he should not refuse."
"Ahh, so that is also why you asked me to attend, you knew the elder would require confirmation of one of his own before he'd willingly lend that weapon," Taakiko comments. If the bird had lips, it might be smirking. "Of course," Noboru says, "I wasn't born yesterday, or even last century. I know the arguments the clans like to use for inaction."
Niamh tenses at the mention of the soul cutting blade, and her breathing becomes more rapid as her anxiety starts rising again. "How.. how is that going to be used?" she asks.
"Carefully," Noboru answers as he pads closer to Niamh. He even noses her right hand and mouths it gently; some sort of mimic of patting? "Be at ease, I will not willingly harm your parents. I simply need to cut the binds between their souls and the yokai that are trying to claim them. I will have to walk the path of the Gods into the reals just beyond this one to find their souls, of course. But all shrines have access to that Path, and all of their guardians like myself can enter it. You, though, should rest. You do not look like you should be standing right now."
"I need to.. do something," Niamh says, and shakes a bit. "They still want me, that.. must be good for something."
"It isn't good for you," Noboru says, kindly. "Tell me, what do you feel you can do? You're shaking."
"Distract them," Niamh suggests. "Give them something to chase. If their hold on my parents is severed.. what will they do, if they don't have a new target?" She bites her lip. "I want to be there when they get sealed again."
Noboru is quiet. "Do you have any idea how dangerous that would be?" he asks, head tilted to the side. "What would you do if they cornered you?"
"Then they wouldn't be watching for you," Niamh says. "Maybe you could act through me. I don't know." Then she really does just fall to her knees. "It's my fault."
"No, it isn't. You cannot blame yourself for the acts of others. Even if something you may have done made it easier, the actions others take were still their own choice and not yours," Noboru points out. He moves to sit beside her and wraps his four tails around the girl. "I know it does not feel like it, but it is not your fault."
"I didn't warn them enough," Niamh says. "I.. stupidly thought the Koma-inu were only interested in me, because my parents don't have my abilities."
"And what would have been warning them 'enough'?" Noboru asks, "And would they have listened?"
"I should have warned them not to open the jars, after I told my father where they were," Niamh says, looking at the ground. "I was trying to impress him."
"Did you know it would happen if he did?" Noboru asks. "Because if not, how would you know to warn them?"
"I didn't think he would uncover the buried chamber so quickly," Niamh admits. "I couldn't stay there.."
"It is not your fault," Noboru repeats. "And wallowing in misery by blaming yourself helps no one, especially them."
"I finally feel back to normal and I still can't do anything," Niamh says. "I still want to purify them, despite what they've done."
"And why is that? Why do you feel they deserve to be saved versus eliminated?" Noboru asks. "You still don't fully know all they've done."
"You didn't want to eliminate them," Niamh says. "Has that changed? If they're purified, the results would be the same; that's no longer be evil. They didn't start that way, did they? They were corrupted by humans, weren't they?"
"Mmm," Noboru mutters. "I merely have less faith they could be. They have been broken for a long time, and their crimes are not easy to forget."
"Then you'll seal them away again?" Niamh asks.
"This time? No, I would consign them to oblivion," Noboru admits.
"Hmm," Niamh goes. "How will you do that?" she asks. "I didn't think spirits could be destroyed."
"It's possible. There are techniques and weapons capable," Noboru says and sighs, "Nothing is eternal. But ... you do not seem as if you approve of this."
"It's not my world, here," Niamh admits. "I don't know what the consequences are for Yokai that possess humans. I can't do anything anyway."
"I do not know why you keep saying that. You claim you want to help, then in the next breath claim you cannot do anything," Noboru points out. "Which is it?"
"What can I do?" Niamh says in exasperation. "I thought I might be able to purify them while they were still sealed away. If they're no longer sealed.. I don't have the power of a full yokai, and certainly not multiple ones. They'd just eat me."
"And if they were sealed away again, would you try to purify them?" Noboru asks.
"Yes, to prevent the same problems from starting up again," Niamh says. "They wouldn't be influencing things outside of their seal then."
"Then is that what you wish to do?" Noboru asks. "You had also mentioned trying to lure them. Do you wish to do that? What is it that would make you feel ... better?"
Niamh sinks down more, fully sitting on the ground now. "I wished.. that I could fix this so nobody lost anything. To show that spirits can be made safe. There are so many sealed spirits in the world, and they affect the people that knowingly or unknowingly hold them. It's my duty to deal with them now that my grandmother is gone."
"The reality is sometimes you cannot fix everything," Noboru says with a sigh and looks our past the edge of the shrine. "And even when tying to restore what has been lost to undo such things, scars always remain. You will never find peace if you cannot accept that there will be times you cannot save everyone, good and bad."
"Should I not try though?" Niamh asks, looking to Noboru again. "I don't have a soul-cutting blade to separate spirits from the people they have a hold on."
"Then make one," Noboru suggests. "Surely someone in your land knows how. And if not, perhaps you could convince the elder of the Tengu clan to give you the secret."
The girl goes a bit wide-eyed at that. "Has the elder ever done that before?" she asks.
"Given the blade in question was forged by a human, I assume at least once," Noboru points out.
"I'd have to.. ask, then," Niamh says. "Maybe there's some way I could adapt it to how I do things." She then makes a few scissor motions with two fingers of her right hand, but doesn't look as if she's joking. "I hardly know anything right now. Has Miyuki returned yet?"
"I have not seen her," Noboru says. "Not abnormal for her when she is upset to be gone for a while."
"I should rest then, until Taakiko returns or.. I panic," the girls says. "I should cry too."
"You could also train for being a lure, or the like," Noboru notes, "If you are wishing to do something. Though it may not help with panic."
"What makes a for a good lure?" Niamh asks. "Shoud I got to the forest stairs and just.. try to attract Yokai?"
"I think you should go take a nap," Noboru says instead. "And leave it to me to decide the best way for you to learn."
"A nap.." Niamh says, uncertainly. "I can try," she agrees.
"Well, you did say you wished to rest," Noboru points out. "Did you mean something other than actually resting?"
"It's more the concept of rest, I suppose," she replies. "I'll try to meditate."
"Personally, I think a nap is more restful," Noboru opines. "Less likelihood of ruminating."
"I'll try not to eat any grass then," Niamh semi-jokes, and tries to get back up onto her feet.
Noboru helps her to her feet using his tails. It also mildly feels like he's groping her a bit.
Niamh barely notices if he is. Once upright she heads for the shrine housing, and puts one hand against a wall as she makes her way to her room. She slides the door open slowly, as if afraid something might be hiding on the other side.
Nothing is waiting for her, no traps, no mysterious monsters. No Noboru practical jokes, either. Just a quiet, dimly lit room.
So, Niamh removes her clothes and folds them up, then sits on the sleeping map. To try and keep calm, she prays. First to Cerridwen for guidance, then Danu for strength, and finally Cerrnenos for bravery. It does help to calm her, and she then curls up on her side to try and sleep.
And the weight of the day hits hard. Things seem to go fuzzy and fade.
Fuzzy. It's funny how many uses that word has. Uncertain edges. Soft, tickly. So many things come with the extra description of 'fuzzy'. And that's how Niamh feels. Fuzzy. Very, very, fuzzy. Also, her nose itches. And it smells funny, like damp earth and moss. In fact the air feels damp, and the floor feels damp and soft.
Without opening her eyes, Niamh tries to rub her nose to deal with the itch first.
Boy, her nose feels sorta long. It's that, or her hands feel all tiny and compressed. Also lacking dexterity. She somehow manages to stick a nail up her left nostril. It hurts a bit!
That brings her fully awake, with an urge to sneeze. She finally tries to see where she is.
The first thing Niamh sees is is a black tipped nose at the end of a long muzzle of white. Where is is, is not in the acolyte room anymore. It's not even the shrine! She's somewhere deep in a forest, and seems to be laying belly-down on a mossy old log. The scents are intense; heady moss and damp earth. Decay and pollen. It seems like it's early evening with the low light filtering through the canopy above.
White suggests.. she isn't sure what. She tries moving her ears and feeling for a tail as well.
Ears that move, check! There's a tail too, and it feels long. And given she's able to swish it around and cover her face with white fluff seems to confirm that.
The first thing this makes her think of is.. Miyuki. So she looks around to see if there's another fox other than herself.
Nope, there's no one here but herself. Now that she's thinking about it, though, she does detect the heady musky sort of fox smell. Something about it seems different, though, like it's ... oh. Niamh feels a bit flushed all of a sudden, and squirmy, and ... needing something. There's this urge to whine, and also to make weird body positions.
"I'm in Miyuki's body," is what she thinks, figuring she's still in heat. Which is.. awkward. But where is Miyuki then? Back in her human body? She tries to overcome the urges and get a better idea of her location. If it is Miyuki's body, she certainly doesn't want to get it pregnant because of some random fox catching her scent!
Nothing about this location looks familiar at all. Not does it smell particularly familiar. Great, she's lost. Or at least she doesn't feel like she knows where this is. There is a slight urge to head, well, what feels like it should be north. Why, though, she doesn't know.
First, just because she has no idea what's actually happening, Niamh tries to say, "Miyuki?"
Well, she might be trying to say Miyuki, but what comes our is an odd sort of warbling whine. Lips, tongue, and throat are not cooperating.
Well.. that is troublesome. And Niamh has no idea how to access Kitsune abilities. So.. she tries to go in the direction she feels the urge to go, hoping something will make sense eventually.
Fortunately Niamh's legs are cooperating, and having some familiarity with walking on four legs means she's able to walk without much problem. It's more difficult to focus, though. Both the hormonal situation that has her feeling the urge to rub parts of herself on anything vaguely round and smooth, and the onslaught of sensory input from those eyes and ears is a bit vexing. It doesn't help she's actually seeing other spirits in the forest flitting and slipping between the branches, or through the underbrush. All things humans rarely notice. One thing her ears do pick up, at least, the sound of trickling water. There's a creek or small river ahead.
She heads for it, hoping it isn't something deep that she'll have to cross.. but she has no idea when this body last drank anything.
When she thinks on drinking, it's then she realizes she is feeling a bit thirsty. Onward she goes, moving with grace through the underbrush. It's a bit exhilerating, the freedom of movement, and how alive the world seems to be to her senses. Aha, just a bit ahead Niamh can see the edge of a small creek.
She pauses before approaching the water. She sniffs the air and pans her ears to see if she can sense any spirits or animals near the water.
Well, nothing she can readily sense that's particularly close to her, or the creek ahead. There is a lot of activity, but nothing seems to be twigging any particular warning sense.
She still moves cautiously to the water, and sniffs it before getting a drink.
And Niamh leans in and licks at the water, she finds it takes a bit of practice to actually drink! There's also something else that stands out after a few seconds. she can see her own reflection and yes, it's the face of a white fox! But ... Miyuki has blue and green eyes, and the fox looking back at her in the water just has two green ones. She also realizes that while she's been bent over to drink, she ended up lifting her butt, and her tail is arched up and over. She's ... presenting, the hormones snuck right up on her again and she did that by pure instinct.
She jerks her head up, and tries to pull her tail down! "Keep moving," she thinks. That should keep her from regressing, and she looks north again to see if she still feels drawn in that direction.
She's finding it really hard to pull her tail down. The moment she quits focusing on it, it's flicking back up and curling over her back. Talk about ... irritating! "Mm, look at what we have here," growls a voice in what sounds like both Japanese, and something she seems to understand perfectly. It's behind her too, maybe a dozen or so feet away? "A lost little shrine fox, all alone. And .. can't you smell it? The vixen is in season. Hah, she's even presenting. Think we could stretch her on a one of our knots? Wouldn't that just be poetic justice; one of those snooty Inari-blessed kits, all ruined by common inu."
Niamh freezes, realizing what's happening. So she tries to run! If it is Miyuki's memory playing out, then it may not matter, but it's the only thing she can think of trying.
Well, her legs are behaving! She takes off! And boy, can she move swiftly; the forest blurs as she launches deeper! "Hey! That vixen is fleeing! Come on, lets get her and teach her a bitch's role is chest down, ass up, to the studs," she hears fading behind her. Then there's growling and thumping as she can make out those creatures are in pursuit, and their longer legs may be helping them gain ground.
Holes! She needs a hole they can't fit through, so she tries to stick to the undergrowth. Foxes and rabbits and badgers dig holes.. she just has to find one!
Or a rotten tree trunk. Or a small cave. Or, well, anything small she can fit into! She can hear the creatures behind her gaining too! And on top of all that there's that sinking gut sort of fear rolling through her, and in complete conflict with that are the urges still, as if instinct is still trying to get her to stop and lift her tail for them. She sees more light ahead, there might be a break in the woods just ahead.
Light isn't the same as the darkness of a hiding place, and she worries that it could be more water, but she runs for it anyway in near panic.
She can see past the forest edge! It's a clearing, sort of, and about two dozen feed out she can make out an old stone wall that seems to just go on forever. But! There's a hole at the base of one part of that wall, it looks like it might be just big enough to squeeze under and through.
She pumps her foxy legs as hard as she can to try and reach the hole! Maybe it's part of the shrine!
She can hear the thundering paws behind her in pursuit. That hole is just ahead. Surely she can make it. Her lungs burn and legs scream as she pushes them past limits in those final feet. The fox practically dives into that hole and squirms her way through. No sooner has she popped her now dirty form out on the other side than she heads impacts on the wall behind her and dust and small bits of mortar and stucco breaking off. She's in a courtyard, she .. thinks. It's disturbingly familiar. Something nags, prods. Just ahead is a younger tree, standing tall and proud. Just a few feet behind it is a small, but well kept wood and stone shrine, flanked by several empty pedestals.
She has to pause to catch her breath. She still needs a safe spot, so she heads for the shrine!
As she heads for that shrine, it comes to her why this place seems familiar. It's that tree; she knows it. She spoke to it. In the courtyard of what became the inn that she and her parents had come to deal with. This place is the home of ... WHAM! Her thoughts are literally jarred from her head as a massive weight slams into her side, and followed up by an impact to the side of her head that leaves her reeling. Instead of seeing stars, half of her vision is just ... gone. Moments later, searing pain explodes on her face and she can feel the heat of her own blood. She goes rolling in the dirt and only comes to a stop when she hits the trunk of the tree. Everything hurts. She can't draw a full breath. She can't see well; only half her vision is there. What she can see is one of her forelimbs stretched out and bent an an unnatural angle, with a bone sticking through it. "Bitch," growls the creature that hit her. It's approaching now, a massive mixture of canine and leonine features. Its right forelimb is spattered in red, and with each step, it's muscles ripple. "You should have just lifted tail and accepted your superiors," it spits and lips draw back from, well ... 'slavering fangs' comes to mind.
"Bad dog," Niamh tries to say, hoping the intent at least will get through. She hardly has breath for it though. She doesn't try to move anymore.
What does dying feel like? Is it a cacophony of intense pain, of searing agony? Or is it when everything seems to go dull and pain simply disappears. Color too. Everything narrows around her, sound growing distant, muffled. As the world itself seems to fall away there's a blinding explosion of white light as something lands between her and the approaching yokai. Five tails bathed if white fire flick and roll in anger as the semi-humanoid creature stares down the approaching beast. "Enough" growls a voice Niamh knows all too well, Noboru. "Not only have you been sowing chaos amongst the humans, you have violated the sanctity of Inari's children. You have harmed my sister. You think us beneath you? You and your human servants, you think yourselves better? This will not stand!," he growls, and it seems to make the entire world roll in thunder, enough that even the branches in the tree above shake. The white light rolling off of Noboru burns with an intensity that the world itself finally falls away into nothing.
Niamh finds the nothingness a relief from the pain, at least. Human servants? She should have asked the tree more details when she had the chance.
It's quiet here. Peaceful. Whoever would have thought that nothing could feel like the one thing she wanted? But, reality intrudes in this place of peace. She feels the backs of lightly furred fingers brushing along her cheek. "Do you think you can still be a lure now that you've seen what kinds of beasts they are? How they delight in hurt and pain; how ... human they have become? Beasts of nature do not main or kill for entertainment. Can you keep yourself focused facing that?" she heads the faint voice of Noboru. It's like he's both right there and somehow far away at the same time.
"That.. depends on the trap," Niamh says, and tries to open her eyes. "Would it help at all, or would they be too wary? My family is at stake, not just myself. If I'm afraid, that just makes it more effective. Do they want to eat me, or use me though?"
Niamh finds herself still in the acolyte's chamber. She's on the floor and her head in in ... Noboru's lap. He's somewhere between human and fox ... and he's petting her cheek. He seems odd; or rather it seems odd in that it might be the first time he's not slightly smirking, or plotting. He looks actually concerned.
"Would it make it easier for you to stop them?" Niamh asks. "Would it help Miyuki get past this?"
"Would what? Being a lure to draw them?" Noboru asks, head tilting in all to of a quizzical canine way. "Perhaps. I am not concerned that they could hurt me. I may be one tail down, but I am still capable of dealing with them. What I cannot do is promise you would not get injured. You've felt their strength now, and you know they have no concerns about mutilating or killing. Even knowing that, all that worries you is if it would help myself or my sister?"
"Shouldn't I want to help you, if you're trying to help me?" Niamh asks. "You always seem to want something. Nothing is free."
"I've already got something, a deer in my harem," Noboru tries to joke and even sticks out his tongue slightly. It's about then Niamh realizes she's, well, kinda deer'ed up at the moment, including a delicate and slight muzzle that he's petting.
"Did I change.. myself?" Niamh asks, but doesn't complain. "And you don't have a harem, do you?" She's comfortable, and that's enough.
"Panic reaction from living through a shared memory," Noboru explains, "It'll fade. And no, not really. Kasumi the other day was the first time in almost a century, if I'm honest about it. I was hoping to at least get a laugh, or a scrunchy-irritated-face. It would have meant you had gotten past the horrors of the day."
"I'm a bit numb, I think," Niamh admits. "And you didn't suggest giving you puppies would help you with the inu. Kasumi will do that, won't she?"
"Heh, possibly. I do not know what will happen between us, only that the healing has finally started," Noboru admits and even shrugs a little. "I was just hoping to convince you there are good aspects of embracing your nature too, and the experiences it can allow."
"And if my parents can't be saved, I would feel better about staying here?" Niamh asks.
"That thought never crossed my mind. Your parents will be saved, on that, I promise," Noboru says. "Even if it means I will never be the one to bring you to our side. Or not be the one to ruin your desire for human men." He just can't say something nice without adding something to induce the desire to hit him can he?
Niamh can't really make proper expressions like this, so turns her ears back instead. "Have you actually seen me express a desire for human men?" she asks.
"No, which is why I want to ruin it ahead of time," Noboru says with a straight face. "A few good ties and you wouldn't even feel humans much even if you did sleep with one."
"So, why did you appear as a human man when you came to find me in the bathhouse?" Niamh asks.
It's right then the door opens and Miyuki takes a step in. She blinks, her tail frizzes out, and she blurts, "Ew! Gross! Gah! Hang an obi on the door!" Out she goes and the door shuts hard!
Noboru blinks, then bursts out laughing and falls backwards! "Talk about perfect timing! I couldn't have timed it better," he wheezes.
"Does she know about the shared memory?" Niamh asks Noboru as she tries to get to her.. feet?
"No, she does not," Noboru says as he struggles to sit up. And well, hooves, not feet, so it's like trying to get up on stilts. "And you may not wish to tell her. She already feels violated," he points out.
"So I have one more thing to feel guilty about?" Niamh complains. "I need to tell her about the inu though."
"Tell her tomorrow," Noboru suggests. "And just ... you understand she did die during that attack. I gave up a century of life and accumulated power to save her. She feels guilty about that, and that she feels a bit like a freak."
"She won't want you to help my parents then, will she?" Niamh frets.
"She would beg me to help them, actually," Noboru says. "Knowing her, I expect she'd offer to give back the life I gave her so that I could be a true five-tail again when dealing with them."
"Then you do need help?" Niamh asks.
"Unlikely," Noboru claims. "You do not believe me?"
"Could they have gotten stronger?" Niamh asks instead.
"Sealed? No. They should be about the same, unless they have feasted on your family line," Nobodu says and shrugs.
"We're descended from the Tuatha de Denaan, so technically we are Ea Sidhe, just.. mortal," Niamh says. "I don't know how much the bloodline matters."
"Plenty," Noboru claims. "Now, you still need to rest and relax. Plus, since Miyuki thinks we were already, ah, busy, we wouldn't want to disappoint her, right?"
"What?" Niamh asks. "Isn't she already disappointed?"
"Do you want to disappoint her more when she finds out she was wrong?" Noboru suggests. He even waggles his brow.
"Considering I just was her, that might be weird," Niamh says.
"It's always weird. When you bleat it'll be weird. When you tie it'll be weird. The only time to worry is when it isn't weird," Noboru claims.
Niamh just flaps her ears at that. "I'm not in the right.. mood," she finally says. "I'm not in estrus as a deer, and.. I still want to be wooed a bit. And be in better control of myself."
"Oh, well, I can trigger estrus," Noboru offers. "That's an easy technique, the lunar rabbits taught me," he continues as she starts to get to his own feet and stretches. "Of course if I do, well, you'll likely be with a litter..."
"I'm definitely not in the mood for that," Niamh says. "I need to practice control more. To specifically not be put into such a state!" She stumbles about, and tries to get her legs to fold under her. "So.. I think I should really rest. If I have to disappoint Miyuki about something, I think this will be the easiest one."