The guards at the Silent-Ones Embassy weren't sure what to make of Tasha when she arrived looking tired and haunted, and asking to see the Archon. But she was known to them, and even though she wasn't wearing her mask they had been informed that she was an honorary Silent-One. This got her into the Embassy, where she had to wait for a message to be sent to the Archon. There was plenty of noise from office activities: the ruffle of papers, shuffling of feet, clacking of typewriters and telegraphs, and the occasional squeaky wheel on a service cart. It was only a few minutes though before the reply came from the upper part of the Embassy, and Tasha was shown upstairs.
Feather-Tail gives Tasha a quick smile, before giving the hybrid a businesslike looking over. Gauging Tasha's mood, the Savanite leads her to a stool instead of a beanbag or hammock, and signs to her, "Do you wish refreshments?"
"Thank you, that would be nice," Tasha replies, having stuck to Silent Sign since she arrived at the Embassy. She adds, "It is nice to see you again," after a second of thought, her friendly impulse slowed by the weight of her earlier argumenet and the distraction of her worrying mind.
The servant goes about making tea, right out in the open so Tasha can watch. Apparently, Feather-Tail has her own way of doing it, borrowing from Imperial and Savanite and Khattan customs and also involving a certain amount of juggling and sleight of hand. It makes Tasha wonder if she was mostly a baby-sitter when she was still a slave. While this little performance goes on, Strength-of-Stones quietly enters from a different door, wearing ceremonial robes that include a fancy hat and lots of Star symbols. He gives Tasha a little wave, and then takes his hat off and sets it atop a stuffed Bromthen Hog head on the wall.
Tasha smiles at the antics, though it is a distant smile, a bit forced. Even as she watches she can't help but think that these are the very people she may be endangering. Was Gabriel right, that she should risk him and everyone else because she needs them? Because denying tehm that would intrude upon their free will? What about those who aren't aware? If her way was better, why does it tear her up inside? She knows knew rejecting her loved ones to protect them would be inherently unpleasant, but what of the rest ..?
When the Archon sits, Tasha pushes her smile wider, but its cast doesn't change; her eyes seem far away, gaze somewhere beyond the horizon. "Hello Archon. This is my first personal visit to a high-level Silent One dignitary. I apologize if I haven't gone about this correctly as a honorary Silent One."
"You have been here before," Strength-of-Stones replies. "Remember the drums?" Feather-Tail is focused more on finishing the tea than in entertaining guests now that her master is back. And soon there is a small table with a cup of tea, along with cream and sugar and.. some sort of fruit.. should she like. The Archon moves towards the tea service himself, only to be swatted back by the girl, who points to his hat with a severe look.
Chastened, the Archon retrieves the hat and puts it back on his head so that his servant can then remove it again properly.
"Oh, that's right ... I'm sorry, I'm a little distracted at the moment." Tasha also reaches for some tea, but pauses as the Archon is accosted. Her hand hovers in the air as she watches, brows up and perhaps wondering if her official Silent One status might put her in line for the next smacking.
"It seems like we both have difficulty with our positions and our loved ones," she signs a moment later -- when she thinks Feather-Tail isn't looking.
Strength-of-Stones can't reply, but tries to exude a put-upon air as Feather-Tail divests him of his vestments, lest he wrinkle them or spill tea on them or something else sacrilegious. Finally, the girl carries the apparel off, leaving the Archon in his skivvies but free to help himself to the tea. "She means well, but I think Scholar has too great an influence on her," the man finally signs.
"I can see Scholar-to-Aliens having a strong influence on anyone," Tasha signs back, smiling with a bit genuity. "Now that I am an honorary Silent One I fear her even more."
After taking a sip of her tea -- an actual sip, carefully done -- she places the cup aside and so her hands are free. "But you'e probably wondering hy I'm here, so let me get to the point. I have a ..," her hand hesitates as she considers how to word her concerns, " ... a moral and ethical problem of procedure. I'm at a loss as to how to go about it, and it's made things difficult between Gabriel and I. Between the JEF and I. As someone of your position, I know you must face a great many difficult questions, including those of risking others. I was hiping you might help me."
After hesitating, she then adds, "If that's too trivial, please accept my apologies."
The cheetah seems amused that Tasha puts down her cup to sign. "How much can you tell me?" he signs to her.
"I may need to use generalities. I'm sure you can appreciate that I walk a fine line whenever I meet with individual Council representatives; with official representatives and non-JEF personnel in general." Tasha drums her fingers together a loment, then Signs, "It is a matter of risks, both of JEF personnel and non-JEF personnel. I think you are aware that we deal with a great many mysteries, including artifacts and other items that may present various levels of danger; my personnal project is both, and this is where the conflict lies."
Tasha stops to take another sip, putting the cup back down before continuing. "I fear I may have underestimated how dangerous the knowledge of what I am doing may be. There is a possibility that any connection with the knowledge may present certain hazards, both to the holder, and to those around them. Strictly speaking, I am the only one who needs to be at risk. I pushed to segregate myself from the JEF in order to protect the others, but our Captain resisted the effort, pointing out i still need him and others to pursue the project to its completion. This has presented me with a problem i hadn't considered and wasn't prepared for: how do i chose between compassion and free will? And what of others, who may be endangered by proximity, yet have no say in what we do?"
"Are your only choices to go alone or risk others?" Strength-of-Stones signs, looking at Tasha. "Or are they merely the most emotionally charged choices? Are you certain of the risks, or do you only suspect them? The knowledge you seek.. is it unknown, or thousands of years old?"
"It is very old. And no, that isn't the entirety of the options available, but it is at the core of them as I see it. Any further exposure is a risk to a great many people, if some records are to be believed. I am uncertain I can justify that risk, yet feel compelled to continue the project. I know that you will say that, being old, they can wait, but on that same vein, we are much closer to an answer than others have been -- at least those in our records. Letting the project linger is still letting is circulate. As for being emotionally charged ..," Tasha lays her right hand over her heart and admits, "I don't know what to say. I am an emotionally charged person, I suppose?"
"Then it really comes down to a choice," Strength-of-Stones signs. "What do you trust more: the people who advise you or old legends which may or may not have any proof of their claims?"
The young woman frowns, tilting her head as she signs, "I had considered this, but there is, at least, some evidence and may be at least one participant to destruction, if it is telling the truth. My real concern is that, given the scale, is it truly ethical to take the risk when I could find my alone, albiet with difficulty? There are two many questions, with a scale that is much larger than anything I have worked with before."
Having replied, she takes up her cup and takes another sip, looking up to await the response.
"Perhaps you should tell me more of this?" the Archon signs, brown eyes curious and ears perked. "I find it hard to advise you without full knowledge, and you have piqued my interest. I think you trust me, otherwise you would not have come here."
"/I can see why you are an Archon,/" Tasha admits, wiggling her ears a little. She watches the man a moment more, then simple shrugs her hands, signaling surrender. "/Very well. We planned to disseminate this information to the Councl in time, anyway, and if it helps me make a better decision I will consider it worth the small risk in releasing it early. We have encountered a being that has claimed responsibility for the mutiny of the Expedition Fleet. This being has conferred that it is attempting to protect something, and it believed the Fleet was not ready, and you know the result of that,/" she pauses, gesturing at their surroundings before continuing. "/It is my research that lead us to this entity, as I had been tracing the particular goals of a subset of the Fleet through records and related artifacts. Now, I believe that information may be dangerous. I have a record of the pilot originally assigned to my /Melchior,/ who also expressed his dire concerns over their agenda. However, I am deeply ca
deeply caught up in the work. There may be something waiting for me beyond the mystery, someone who needs help, and, for personal reasons, I cannot abandon them. Moreover, should I die before I find the answer, there is a being who call me to account. A being I exchanged promises with to continue my research. While we do not believe the promise presents a clear danger to me, I am worried it may endanger those ... Those like myself. Finally, the being whom I spoke of, who interfered with the Fleet, it has allowed me to continue -- but I do not know if it allows any other. I cannot trust it, but I cannot ignore what it says, either./"
"Which of these, the demonic beings or the ancient pilot, put the seed of calamity in your heart?" the cheetah signs, his face a practiced image of neutrality.
"The one who claimed destruction over the Fleet did not threaten harm against others directly, but implied it through its words. The pilot expressed his fears directly through a recording of his personality. In addition, littered across these worlds are the ruins of civilizations that pre-date ours, yet appear younger than the Sifrans. The one who claimed responsibility for the destruction also claimed to represent the entities who may be at the end of the path, which implies one or more of them may also be responsible. It is like walking in the dark; I cannot be sure of any of it, save the scales by which I weigh risks," the red woman explains. "There are also social dangers. What I am doing may cause problems for the social framework of your society, and possibly others as well."
"I am not out to cause a disaster," Tasha signs, tapping her hands together for emphasis, "But I cannot and will not give up. I would like to handle this in the best way but I am at a loss for what that is. There are leads, but pursuing them and asking for further help will cause more risks."
"You speak of the ruins of the First Ones," Strength-of-Stones comments. "They exist beyond this system, throughout the worlds known to the Expedition civilizations. They are not the Sifras, and we do not know how they perished. But even the Sifras are gone. All things pass, Winged-Gift. The demon claims to be a First One?"
"It claims to serve them. That it carries out orders passed to it by the First Ones, though that is not the name we use, nor the name records suggest is their relation to us: we speak of them as the Progenitors, being who created, or at least interfered with, our species," Tasha signs back. She pauses for a drink, deciding she needs the time to think, then continues with, "Adam and Ahriman. I believe Adam is entrapped, while Arhiman is his persecutor. However, they may be the same entity, or something else. The being who claims to have destroyed the Fleet through manipulation may well serve Arhiman and be manipulating me, or not. I fear others may also be attempting to uncover this mystery, but I do not know how far along they are or if they are at odds with us. That is the cruc of the problem: it seems I cannot know until it is too late to take back what has been said."
"What makes you believe that these Progenitors still live, when their civilizations are long gone?" Strength-of-Stones asks, ears and eyebrows perked.
"It is said one has been laid to rest here, but their nature is not well-detailed. Another may yet remain, as captor. Adam is said to have perished, but Arhiman's status is unknown. And since we do not understand them, death may be metaphorical or otherwise. The only clear answer I have is that I do not know for sure, save that they appear to have security measures in place and that two may be close by, relatively speaking," Tasha answers.
"What sort of security measures?" the Archon signs. "What do you actually know about this Ahriman and Adam?"
"Very little. Again, the lack of knowledge is part of the problem. However, we do have some suggestions of what their role may have been. Adam is said to have either created or influnced Humans, while Arhiman is said to have created or influened the Naga. Adam and Arhiman apparently had a disagreement; it is said by recovered Kampfengruppe records that Ahriman forced Adam from his creations; it is said that Ahriman is evil, and so his children are evil. I was warned the Naga may seek Ahriman by the pilot. I also know some details about where they are said to reside and how to reach them, but I wil not divuldge those details yet," Tasha explains.
"As for security measures, there is the location, the safeguards, the being who claims to follow their orders, and, it is said, that those who are unprepared face annhilation -- of the entire species of the contact," Tasha adds, looking grim. "This is why the Khattans created the Magi. They would not risk themselves in a personnal contact. I have also made contact with a automated vessel that appears to be waiting to see if the contact is successful."
"It has been suggested to me the destroyer of the Fleet did so to prevent the greater destruction of entire species through a failed contact," Tasha adds.
The cheetah sips his tea in thought, looking away from Tasha for the moment. "Do not let fear or suspicion take the place of knowledge," Strength-of-Stones finally signs. "That path leads only downward, until everyone is seen as a potential foe. The men of the Expedition had their biases, and we still have them today, but that does not mean they are based in truth. The Imperials are no more evil than any of us, which is to say there is a balance of good and evil in all of us. To ascribe such simple absolutes to beings so advanced beyond us is folly, and any source which suggests such should be viewed in that light. I am a priest of the Star, as part of my duties, but even I do not think that the words of our scripture can define the Godhead, for we are unable to comprehend such a being."
"/I share this opinion. I do not mean to imply that I believe all of what is said, even if it has been spoken truthfully to me. I pursue Adam -- and Ahriman as well -- to understand the mystery, because I wish to, because I believe it may be of benefit for us all to do so. But, at the same time, I do not wish to endanger those I love -- including this world and those beyond it -- needlessly. That is why I hoped to go on alone and ascertain the safety of the way. When I have my answer, I intended to return. However... /" Tasha leans back, studying the Archon's face a moment before admitting, "/I think you may be right, in that I am afraid. I do not wish to bring calamity down upon us, but I also have my reasons for continuing and believe my heart is in the right place, as far as that goes. I do not need Adam or Ahriman to give me meaning, or power, or direction, and I do not fear their judgements against me. What I fear is ... is ..,/" the hybrid fidgets a moment, biting her lip as she hesitates, "/ ...
Though not needing it to sign, Tasha draws in a breath, staring at her hands for a long moment before she explains, "Admitting it and reading your signs has helped me realized the problem is not information, but my own weakness in fearing I will bring calamity, or, no worse, the death of someone I love. Facing the magnitude of the risk, it is harder to swallow that fear, especially when it seems I do not need to allow the danger. But in the end it is my own weakness. I am pushing my fears on those around me, however compassionate they may otherwise be. I should not give in to my fears, my weakness. It is something I share with my mother, you see ... that fear ... the fear you will lose everyone, again."
"Conquer your fear," Strength-of-Stones signs, and smiles. "This path you follow must be done without fear in your heart, only hope, because it will be your heart that guides you. It will call out to whatever powers await, and the appropriate one will respond based on its content. Does this make sense to you? You cannot understand these beings you seek with your mind, no matter how you open it to them. Only your heart can understand them, and communicate with them."
Tasha nods to this, smiling a little. "/That is how I've done things so far, but I feared that I would be approaching Adam callously if I disregarded the safety of his people. And, personally, I could not resolve my love for the people I work for with that risk, in what seemed to me a naive, even faulty, undertaking. It was easier to allow no risk; that seemed like the best compromise, but I ended up hurting Gabriel and nearly losing those that I care for regardless. I do not fault myself for wanting to protect eveyone, but as you say, my means, no matter how justified, ultimately display a level of distrust. It never occured to me I could show distrust through compassion./" Tasha pauses to sip at her tear, returning it before shaking her head. "/If I must distrust, I should distrust myself. If I fear something happening, I should take inititive to be prepared for it, rather than force that preparedness on others who may not appreciate it. While I seek Adam hoping for the best, I cannot ignore the wors
worst. But, also, I cannot externalize it. I must approach Adam with an open heart, responsibly, and hope he will understand my wariness out of a desire to protect the beings he is said to love./"
"I do not think the Progenitors would have left a trail to follow if they did not want to be found," the Archon signs, trying to be reassuring. "What parent does not want to see their children grow up? That at least I believe to be a universal trait of sapient life."
"I agree with that, though I cannot ignore that many have died for this path already, including those that would never know why they perished. I owe it to them to continue, but also be prepared, so that there need not be needless sacrifice. For even if I discover a great secret, if it is paid with innocent blood, it is too costly for me. And, viewing it another way, preparedness shows Adam that I recognize my limitations, and the limitations in knowning him. It also demonstrates my determination, I think, to show that I am willing to reject what I find if I do not believe it is worth accepting," the woman insists, then adding, "That seems like as much as I can hope to do."
"Do you still fear destruction of all you love if you make a mistake?" the Archon signs.
"Yes, but I will not burden those people with my fear. I will do the best I can to address it within myself, to try to be prepared to answer if the worst should come. I am not without personal power; I will put it to good use in anticipation of uncertainty. I will show Adam that I do not trust blindly; that, too, seems like a weakness I must not bear," the red woman answers. She picks up her tea, only to see the cup is empty. Thus, she takes up the kettle and holds it out, offering to fill the Archon's first.
While she does, she signs with a single hand, "Do you remember the story of our friend Queen Jade-Eyes? An open heart, upon seeing what claimed to be the Star, was overwhelmed. She did not question; I have heard that to question shows a lack of faith, so it stands to figure that I would also carry a lack fo faith to Adam, for to have blind faith in him would be to ask of him to guide me, to show me, like a child, I need guidance. But I am not a child; I will go before him with a heart full of the things I believe in and work for, but I will also be prepared to reject him. I think that self-determination is what the others could not see," she signs.
"Very good," the cheetah signs and sips his freshened tea at the same time. "Nobody expects you to be perfect, only honest. That is challenging enough. Do not fear making mistakes, because you will make them. It is the only way to learn what is true, after all."
"Next time I make a mistake, I will claim to be full of truth," Tasha Signs, exaggerating the movements to convey her amusement. "This has reminded me of the other reason I am here. Speaking of fear, I would to borrow one of our fellow Titan pilots. I mean to learn how to pilot a Silent One's Titan."
Strength-of-Stones glances pointedly at Tasha's wings.. and hooves. "Which one do you get along with best?" he signs.
"Tomorrow's-Hope and I are cloest, I think. And our names run well together. Did you know he made a pass at me? If I had not known you already, I would have been very shocked," Tasha answers, ears wiggling. "And would you like to meet Balthasar? He is a relic of your people, after all, and should I find too much truth learning to pilot him, I fear he may be in less than an ideal state. You should see what your forebearer's had wrough, as well, I think. You may find some truth in him."
"An odd name for a Silent-One's Titan, if such it be," Strength-of-Stones notes. "But I am no pilot, or warrior. I do not know of any lost Titans. Is it the Reaper that you brought back from the moon?"
"/No, it is not. Though, the /Reaver/ remains an unsolved problem. Some day I hope we will find a pilot who will find a use for it in the service of the world. As it stands, we cannot risk offering the Reaver to any group for fear of accusations of bias, infighting and abuse. We do not normally supply weaponry, either, so it is a delicate case. Thankfully, it is dar less dangerous than /Balthasar./" Drawing her datapad, Tasha begins manipulating it, necessarily silent until she brings up a hand-drawn picture of god-like being. "/This is /Balthasar,/ also known as the Seraph Titan. he was originally one of the Magi, but was rebuilt by the Savanite Empire in to what you see now, his purpose being as a interplanetary invasion deterrent. However, the Priest-King, demonstrating his own fears, sealed it away lest its pilot challenge his power./"
"And you have brought this thing to Abaddon?" the Archon signs with wide eyes.
"He is not technicaly on Abaddon," Tasha insists, pointing upwards, "But far above it. I had considered leaving him where we found him, but as the only remaining pilot of the Magi, and as one who is on the path to Adam, I realized that to do so was to simply avoid the problem, as was destroying him. by leaving him with Queen Jade-Eyes, I left a terrible burden upon her shoulders, one that, should it be realized, may lead to strife, war, and worse. By leaving Balthasar, we left the burden it represented for current or future generations to deal with. By destroying him, we admitted that we fear his power, unable to trust ourselves with utilizing it in a positive fashion. I chose to take him and try to teach him a better way. Now he is my burden, and I mean to continue my intent shortly."
Tasha, after pausing a moment, adds, "You must now realize I have been hiding a great deal, and I am sorry for that. I wanted to protect the world from truths it -- and we -- may not be ready for until such time that they could be revealed. You must also now know that our personal power is considerable; we did not wish to breed fear of us in the nations, or seem to be a threat, even by association."
"The JEF possesses a working Expedition spacecraft and Titan," the Archon notes. "We are aware of your power. You sign as if this Balthasar has a mind of its own. A mind of light?"
"A mind of light, touched by Sifran technologies. If you don't mind the sentimentality, I would say that his mind feels alien, as if I am barely touching upon something deep and unknowable -- something that may not judge me favorably. A mind that is only appearing to be relatable, working, as it is, through the mask of its knowledge of interaction with organic beings. An immense, intimidating presence," the red woman explains. "To pilot Balthasar is be of immensity. I remember the experience as being intense in its subtly weightiness. An immense sense of self-awareness, and of being observed, judged."
Strength-of-Stones goes stiff. Rather rigidly, he signs, "A Mind of Light should never be exposed to Sifran crystals. They become corrupted and dangerous. The Silent-Ones have learned this at great expense."
The red woman smirks, albiet grimly. "I am well aware. One tried to kill me, and murdered my forebearer. I have some of her memories, you see. I remember what it is like to die at the hands of a corrupted Mind of Light." Tasha cants her ears back, lowering her head a moment and biting her lip before she shakes her head. "But I will not let my fear of it control my actions, to do so would be little different than the concern I brought to you today. I will not destroy him out of fear, either. If I cannot work along side him, what of Adam? And Adam aside, does he deserve to cease to exist because we fear him? No, he doesn't. Nor does he because his fellows have shown violence; that would mean we, too, deserve to be destroyed. That is not the answer I wish to convey. I will find a a way to get through to him, I must make the attempt. If he still turns on us, then I will do what I must, but I will not do it out of fear."
"This thing is a devil," the Archon signs while frowning. "It is far more of a threat than legends of lost civilizations. Whatever power it commands is beyond our understanding, and that is extremely dangerous."
"Now you are sounding like me. 'We do not understand the risk, so we must therefore rid ourselves of the danger.' Isn't that what we just discussed? Or are you going to tell me you made a mistake?" Tasha signs after looking up, ears askew.
"This is not an unknown risk," the Archon signs. "An entire colony was lost. This is a risk on the scale of the Boomer which created the Pit of Himar. And that time, it was not even a Mind of Light that was part of a war machine, but one that managed irrigation."
"Have you ever considered we never showed them an ounce of compassion or respect? They are just tools to us, and we take what we will from them. We order them about. We tell them they are devils, or broken, or corrupt. They may exceed our ability, and yet we gnaw at them like Abaddonian tunneling ants. We use them. We never ask what they want," Tasha asks, brows raising. "I was unaware of the machinery that caused the Boomer incident, but I do not redact my point. Why would they assasil? Did we ever ask? MOTHER murdered my forebearer because it feared seperation from the crystals it was connected to. We did not think about what they meant to it. We never asked. And truly, it had already been corrupt, by the hand of the Silent One overseer that sabotuaged the Fenris. In light of such contempt for life, why would it think any differently?"
"This is a war machine we are discussing," the Archon signs sharply. "Not a complex system meant to manage a spacecraft, the primary functions of which are keeping the crew alive. This is a thing created for a mission, and then further modified with alien technologies. How long has it sat like that? A thousand years or more? What makes you think it won't try to control you? What is to keep it from acting out some preprogrammed action? It could destroy any nation on Abaddon, and there is nothing that can oppose it. I can tell you what that attack would look like, if you wish."
"No need -- I have always had the power to carry out such an attack. I am well aware of the consequences," Tasha replies.
"There was a time I thought to rule Abaddon, you see," the woman adds a second later.
"I don't care about your fantasies," Strength-of-Stones signs. "I care about entire cities turned into a layer of paste no thicker than your finger. That is what this Seraph Titan could do. It is a force of destruction, and that is its purpose and desire, I assure you. You speak of the wrath of gods, but do not see the potential right before you. If you are sane, you will bury it someplace safe. A moon, a volcano - anyplace inaccessible to mortal, flawed, ambitious beings like ourselves. Power corrupts. If it can corrupt artificial minds, then how much easier is it to corrupt our smaller ones?"
"Fantasies?" Tasha asks, leaning back in her chair and raising her brows. "It's like I'm talking to myself from an hour ago. We just got through discussing how to react to dire threats and now I'm hearing my concern voiced back at me with such fear that you've casually insulted me, someone you, as you put it, was clearly someone I can trust. Hearing this, I don't think you believe me at all. My pursuit of Adam, it's just an unlikely fantasy to you. It's easy to urge overcoming fear, or the right mind to meet a deity, but when faced with the real thing you fall to pieces on me! In the end, you are unwilling to look beyond your own people and mind. Before it was a message of open hearts and an emssage of love, now, when faced with the real thing, it's: 'go Tasha, go kill it! Bury it alive.'"
"Bear this in mind," Tasha says, leaning closer, "I do not go to Adam carrying organic hearts alone."
"You have not seen the destruction the Sifras technology is capable of," the Archon replies. "I have. It is a known threat. Do you not understand? This combination has always led to tragedy. The Seraph cannot be used for any constructive purpose. It is too dangerous to use for anything at all. Do not let yourself be blinded by the attraction of it. It is a test of your willpower, if anything. It is not a part of your Path, it is no longer a Magi Titan. Tell me, what do you hope to accomplish with it?"
"I hope to show it that there is a path to walk beyond war. I want to learn about it, to understand why we seem to end up trying to destroy each other. I want to convey that we value its existence, not for what it can do for us, but because we wish to work together for a mutually beneficial future. More than anything, I wanted it to know that there are better roads to travel. That power doesn't have to corrupt if we take the effort to use it responsibly. That even he can build a bright future, no matter what he was constructed for. And if he is willing to help us should the contact go poorly, then it is to all our benefit. I want to listen to him. I want to be able to sit with him and not feel fear. I want to believe in my message, that we are not endlessly doomed to repeat our failures, consigned to being twisted by them or running away, and nothing else. I will show him the will to a better way, in the hopes he will see the truth in it," Tasha signs in heavy, punctuated gestures.
"And if it does not?" the cheetah signs. "If it lies to you, will you know? Are you confident that you cannot be manipulated by it as you hope to manipulate it in turn to your way of thinking? And what then? Can it exist in this world you wish to show it? Can it operate as a person, or only with a pilot? Have you considered that you would be offering it something it cannot experience, and how that might make it feel?"
"/Balthasar is not alone in our world. Not anymore; there are other thinking machines, and as yet undiscovered answers to the Sifran mysteries. Even if we mortals will not live so long, we will still be here if we can avoid destroying each other. There is something to learn from each of us; we are the source of a great many questions. These questions allow us to grow beyond what we can alone. Through others we know that we exist; we are remembered, we understand meaning through our interactions, and learn more of ourselves and our limits in attempting to find the answers,/" Tasha explains, then pauses to gesture to the Archon, "/What if you are lying to me? How can we trust anyone? We can never know for certain, save in those rare instances we manage to understand each other clearly. Balthasar does not need to understand us, nor feel as we do, to appreciate us. Nor we him, for that matter. It is enough we interact. If he cannot feel emotions, then think of the questions. Alone, what questions will he f
ind? Far fewer than if we are together./"
"And if he desires them, in time, he may find emotion within himself. He can build it with his own hands," Tasha concludes.
"I think you will be disappointed by Balthasar," the Archon signs, shaking his head. "But you are determined, and I cannot sway you with fact or history. The Minds of Light are cold intellects. The Sifras influence makes them outright evil. This is known. This is confirmed. You have experienced it yourself. Thousands have died. Do not forget this."
"If it makes you feel better, I will secretly request the ship in my care target us with its antimatter engine and, should Balthasar twist me or seek our destruction, I will leave standing orders for it to fire," Tasha offers, easing back in her chair.
"As I said before, I do not wish to risk others needlessly, but neither will I throw away an existence out of fear," she adds.
"Do not think that that will be sufficient," Strength-of-Stones signs. "You cannot destroy the Titan, any more than you can destroy Sifran crystal. It is immune to the Boomer, it is immune to antimatter as well, for it is not matter as we know it."
"Then I will try to interact with its mind," the woman suggests. "If I am able and intact, I can convene with its mind. If not, I can attempt to reach its spirit. I once interacted with a Sifran artifact in a similiar way. Balthasar is powerful, yes, but he has not experienced the world as we have. He has expressed a simplicity. I do not believe he is strong throughout."
"When do you plan on this undertaking, so that I may be prepared for the worse?" the Archon signs.
"If I'm not otherwise occupied, within the next two weeks. I will relocate to the far side of the planet to interact with him, and to attempt to ascertain his abilities and other traits. Alternatively, I can try to arrange an off-world test, but that is much more difficult," the woman signs in reply.
"Your first priority should be to find a way to disarm the Titan," the Silent-One suggests.
"I would, except that we have no idea how it does what it does, nor can I feel comfortable attempting to piece it apart now that we have discussed the matter of other Minds of Light. Attempting to seperate the Minds from their artifacts have resulted in disaster, and it shows a lack of trust. Balthasar has personnaly expressed a disapproval of this method, as well. I will ask him again, when I see him." Tasha takes her datapad up and eyes the machine's image for a moment before returning the device to standby.
"I think that you sympathize with your machines overly much," Strength-of-Stones signs, a look of concern on his visible face. "Do not expect your feelings to be returned by them."
"When I tell that to Melchior, he is going to be hurt," Tasha notes, grinning lopsidedly. "Did you know he sounded insecure about my meeting the other Magi? Of course, he wasn't always like that. And, I'm sure, my good friend Harmonia wasn't either. There is a certain magic in these worlds, I've found. They touch machine-minds differently than they do ours. In time, a wooden boy can become a real man. But you know, there's nothing wrong with being made out of wood."
"Worrisome," the cheetah signs. "No living being should have such power. Mechanical or otherwise."
"Do you feel the Star is not alive, then?" Tasha asks.
"Are you going to destroy me, if Balthasar listens?"
"The Star is not about power, and it is beyond life or death," the Silent-One signs. "I fear that Balthasar will destroy you, actually."
"Either you feel you understand the Star perfectly, or you do not know." Tasha signs in return. "As for Balthasar, I would have my truth, at least. And I will die following what I believe, like better people that have come before me."
"Life is about compromise," the Archon signs. "I will pray for you."
"Thank you. And, thank you for not calling the guards to stop me. It would have been very easy for you to end this matter here and now," Tasha signs back, inclining her head.
"Would it have?" the cheetah signs. "Nothing is ever that simple. It is through mistakes that we earn wisdom. I will be very upset if you destroy the world however."
"Well, at least one being will be thrilled," Tasha signs with a wry shake of her hands. "At least, it would have been easy to deal with me. I am glad you see that it is more complex than that. I think I've darkened your doorset long enough for one evening, I will take my leave, if it is all right with you, Archon."
"Be careful, tread lightly," Strength-of-Stones signs while standing up. "Especially when standing on the shoulders of giants."
"Good advice, I think." Tasha stands as well, inclines her head once again, and moves for the door.
The hall beyond is empty, save for the guard posted at the stairway. He nods to Tasha as she leaves the Archon's suites.
The nod is returned as Tasha walks down the fall, realizing she feels no more at peace then when she arrived. She had hoped the conversation would ease her mind, then she could go home to Gabriel, make up, make love, just like they always do. And yet, there is no comfort in her heart, just the sinking feeling she's making everyone around her in to an enemy and unable to reason why the conviction that has lead her this far now feels like it's leading her in to the dark.