Dragon's Garden
A static sun hangs overhead in a cloudless blue sky, shining down on grass, flowers and trees with colors that seem just a bit too vibrant to be real. The babbling brook nearby tends to repeat itself, and the grass is a bit overly cushioned and even. The center of the garden has a picnic laid out under the shade of a large apple tree, its limbs burgeoning with golden fruit.

The surroundings don't quite reflect Alptraum's mood, which is anything but colorful. But at least it's refreshingly private again - no massive camp stretching to the horizon and filled with strange beings preparing for who knows what. Even Kaira looks happy to see the bat. "You look like you need cheering up," she notes, kneeling on a red-and-white checkered picnic blanket.

"I just watched a naga eat dead Eeee children, cart them off to the mists, then barf them up, only to then have them given to a tree that makes them grow into living, but mindless bodies. I'm not even that religious and doing that is repugnant beyond words. Let the child die and stay dead; don't reuse the body for some sort of horrible thing," Alptraum remarks, grim, and sits down on the blanket. HE draws his legs up and hugs them for balance.

"Out in crazyland, the mist valley north-ish of Babel," Alptraum answers, waving his hand slightly in a vague sense od direction.

"Hmmm," the dragon ponders. "I wonder if it was there before the mists? It might explain something.."

"I'm not that old. I wouldn't know. It just makes pop people out of dead babies," Alptraum mutters.

"Never drew a breath," Kaira mutters. "Twin. Twins. What is it about twins.. oh.. hmmm. I know a story. Want to hear it?"

"Probably not, because I don't recall the ending very well," the dragon claims. "Anyway, long ago and far away and so on, there were a king and queen of some happy mythical kingdom. You know the type, I'm sure. And they had a prince! Who got savaged by a wolf or a boar or something while on a royal hunt, and died from the wounds. The king and queen were devastated of course. Always the worst time to make big decisions.."

"Depends. Sometimes stress forces you to make a choice instead of endlessly debating it," Alptraum points out and waves his right hand. "Anyway, continue."

"The were visited by a strange hunched over man or something, never showed his face. He told them that they should have more children. But if the queen birthed twins, she must drown one of them immediately, before it could draw breath, and hand it over to the man. Doing so would ensure that the surviving twin would not ever have to die. So yeah, they agreed, probably to get the creepy man to leave them alone. But what he didn't tell them was that if they didn't do as he said, none of the children would survive a year," Kainudy recites. "And of course that part came true. The single-born children all perished mysteriously. So that when the queen did bear twins.. the king quickly drowned the second-born."

"None of these tales are ever happy, you know. Frankly, I should have been killed upon birth, all things given. I shouldn't have lived in the first place, just a thing kept alive by magic and mistakes," Alptraum notes.

"And do you think none of this would have happened without you?" Kaira asks. "This goes back centuries. And I think the tree is part of it. Because in the store, the surviving twin turned into a fine prince, and then.. got gored by a bull? Something with a horn. Everyone was sure he was done for.. but the creepy man showed up and replaced the damaged flesh and organs and such, and the prince was good as new. And so on.. accidents would happen, but the creepy guy always had the needed spare parts. Then someone told the prince about his lost twin, and he purposely hurt himself so the creepy guy would come, only this time he followed him back. Back to a strange tree in a pit. And that's where the twin was. Being harvested for whatever was needed, but it would grow back because the twin was soul-empty. A machine made of flesh, created by the tree. The prince was horrified, and.. something something something.. he never was able to stop the creepy guy. He'd get older, become the king, and whenever something

went bad it was replaced by a fresh piece from the twin. Until their was nothing left but the twin's flesh, and.. I forget the rest. Probably something awful.."

"This is not exactly making me feel any better about the situation, you know. And I do have a twin, that poor guy forced to look like me and then basically kept a prisoner," Alptraum points out, "Also intended to die in my place. So I can appreciate the situation."

"Well, the thing is.. that tree might have inspired the old Sabaoth," Kaira says. "The whole immortality via your offspring, instead of a spare-parts factory. That tree just seems out of place in the mists. I'm guessing you want to destroy it, right?"

"At some point, yes. Or stop it. OR get it to do something good," Alptraum says as he shrugs. "If you haven't figured it out yet, I'm not all that keen on just killing everything. It's not something I want to ever come easy to me. Once killing becomes easy, so will a lot of other things I'd rather not be."

"Good sentiment, I suppose," Kaira agrees. "And I don't know what would kill it anyway, since it's.. not really alive. For a machine, you gum up the mechanism. For the tree, actually introducing a spirit to it might do that. But it's probably a very bad idea to use the dagger in the mist-world."

"If it had a spirit of its own I could rip it out as the Barsunala," Alptraum notes, "Or give it one. What a boon a tree like that could be for medical reasons if it could copy parts."

"That's right, you can transfer spirits," Kaira says, and looks thoughtful. "The mists are a region where boundaries are blurred. Flesh and spirit, life and death.. they all sort of merge together. You would probably need to collect the ingoing spirit outside the mists, then carry it to the tree and do the transfer."

"It is my primary role under Sunala. I'm like that boatman I heard tale of from one of the weirdos in here. Charon. Only I'm not as boney and I think I'm worth more than two coins," Alptraum notes.

"And you don't have a boat, and instead of a river there's a sea," the dragon adds. "Soo.. you need a spirit. What kind though?"

Kaira gives Alptraum a sour look. "I'm not a proper spirit you know. You want someone who is good with trees, like a dryad or nymph."

"I could make you a proper spirit," Alptraum counter claims. "I know where to get good booze."

"Your mood is lightening, I think," Kaira says with a grin. "Now.. what would you ideally like the tree to do?"

"I'm not a farmer. I have no idea," Alptraum admits. "Though, Babel could use some exports that make them seem like a better place. Good medicines, food, something like that. Something that helps people; makes the world better in some way."

"I suppose it could grow fruit," Kaira suggests. "Meat fruit. With blood in it. For vampires! You could bring a seed back for your Promethean pals."

"Hm. Maybe. Or fruit that can grow in harsh conditions for areas of famine. Easy to cultivate," Alptraum suggests. "Or some that lasts a very long time in storage."

"Sounds like a job for.. a nymph of some sort," Kaira claims. "I don't know of any other tree-spirits off hand. At least, none that aren't monsters themselves."

"Not all nymphs are nice," Kaira admits. "Water nymphs especially. Tree ones seem.. pretty nice. Depending on the type of tree. Pine tree nymphs are notoriously promiscuous. Some have sticky skin, or smell funny though. A few are like the ones you ran into in Sylvania, even."

"I rather imagine we all smell funny to other species," Alptraum notes, "Something I have learned with how many different bodies I've had now."

"You get used to it," Kaira says, and raises a finger. "The hardest part is not salivating in certain groups."

Alptraum leans his head forward so that he can rub the back of his neck. "I honestly don't know what I should do now. I got a lecture from one of the Yodhsunala about embracing what I was and such. I was tempted to show her just how scary I could be by letting go of all the control I have on the draconic aura, let loose the shadow, and show her how terrifying I could be if I didn't practice restraint. She kept making it sound like it was just so easy to be me, and it honestly isn't. I've seen monsters, and I know I could become just like them if I didn't keep things in check. I just wish other people would appreciate that I make the effort; that I don't just give in and lord over others, or worse, devour them."

"They only have the Seven Sisters for comparison," Kaira notes. "So.. the notion of self-restraint is fairly recent when it comes to deities. They probably don't expect them to have any. And that bleeds over to you. They assume you're already letting loose as you are, maybe."

"So, should I make a point and show them what I could be if I did let loose? Basically instill some actual fear in them?" Alptraum asks.

"No, I don't think so," Kaira says, shaking her head slightly. "You want to instill fear in your enemies, and inspiration in your allies. The important thing is knowing when you are and are not ready to let loose."

"It gets tiring having them imply I'm some sort of wimp or coward. They aren't the one who risks losing themselves and their own soul if they indulge," Alptraum notes and sighs. "If I wanted to, I could simply take over. I could devour anyone who threatened me in any way, over power wills, and so on. How is actively refusing to be like that being a coward?"

"Don't expect them to understand," Kaira notes. "They live in a world where the powerful get to do whatever they want, with little or no consequences. The notion of someone not using their power is just.. not in their experience."

"Then maybe I should do nothing. If they're satisfied with that, then why should I bother to change it?" Alptraum asks.

Kaira sighs. "Do you really care what they think?" she asks. "Doing what is right must count for something, doesn't it? There's a reason they're called the ignorant masses. Has your father, or the mages, or any of the other people trying to save the city criticized you for not going overboard?"

"Yes, I care what people think. If you only change the few, but the majority remain the same, in effect nothing has really changed," Alptraum points out. He rests his chin on his knee, adding, "And it makes me feel very lonely."

"Anyway, back to the tree. You suggest I should stuff a nymph in it. I don't know where to find one," Alptraum notes, changing the subject.

"I'm always here for you you know," Kaira says, then seems to stare off into space. "Plenty in here.. how big is the tree, would you say?"

"Huge. I couldn't see the top. Probably ten feet in diameter at the base, perhaps bigger. And I thought I couldn't use the dagger there," Alptraum points out.

"You can still transfer single souls around without it," Kaira notes, still apparently searching. "You just need to have a container to smuggle it into the mists.. Ah, that's a big tree. Let's go see it." She takes Alptraum's hand, and then they're standing in a forest. One with really big trees - but also trees Alptraum's seen before: Giant Chestnut Trees. The sort Kadies like.

"And that's what they call a rhain of the tree world. Long and ... stiff," Alptraum comments rather crudely as he looks up ... and up.

There's not much undergrowth, and the spread of the canopies means the trunks are well spaced. "See one you like?" Kaira asks the bat.

"I've ... never been one to like a tree so to speak. Should I be looking for something in particular?" Alptruam asks as he looks about the trees. "I, for some reason, think some sort of grandfather-y tree might be best. Something old, with wisdom, and nothing to prove. So, not so easily corrupted."

"Hmm, let's wander around until one seems.. wise," Kaira suggests. Some of the trees do seem young or old. Eventually they find a real giant, with patches of gray moss and deep ruts in the bark.

"Does what I say even make sense to you?" Alptraum asks. "Older things tend to be more stable, less influence-able. Well, unless senile, but you get my meaning? Something that could withstand the weirdness of its surroundings; something with strong self."

"Are you calling me old?" Kaira asks, one eyeridge raised as she looks sideways at Alptraum.

"They aren't wrinkles," the tree claims. Or rather, the face the sticks out of it claims. It's very elfin, with brownish mottled skin that matches the colors of the bark, pointed furry ears and green mossy hair. "They're laugh lines."

"A lot of funny things happen here?" Alptraum has to ask. "Well, other than the usual things that happen underneath trees."

"I have a good sense of humor," the nymph claims, finally stepping fully out of the tree. She looks like a typical elf, if a bit heavier (which makes her nearly human in proportions). Instead of the usual leafy motif, she sports a giant fluffy squirrel tail to go with her ears. There are a few patches of bark-like skin here and there, breaking up the youthful smoothness of the skin. "I know jokes. Like: why did the fox cross the road?"

"No good joke ever starts with a line like that," Alptraum is compelled to comment, "But I will bite. Why?"

"It was chasing after the chicken," the nymph claims, and then smiles wide and proud.

"And when a wagon came by and ran over its tail, it even had a brush with death," Alptraum adds and smirks.

The nymph leans in more, trying to get nose to nose. "What other jokes do you know? Any involving acorns? Or crows?"

"The problem with crows is they come kawing too much," Alptraum counters as he leans further back.

"And if a crow gets too intimate with its lady crow, he could end up with egg on his face," the Eeee adds.

This earns Alptraum two hands grabbing his shoulders. They aren't quite as tough as wood, but not weak either. "How many jokes do you know?" she demands, looking as serious as a naked, mottle-skinned woman with a squirrel tail can.

Alptraum's large ears splay out. "I have no idea. I've never kept count! Most are only funny if you're drunk," the Eeee claims, wide-eyed.

"Drunk?" the nymph asks, tilting her head to one side. "Is that.. is that a vampire thing? You can drink jokes?"

"No, fermented beverages. They make mammals drunk; it affects the brain," Alptraum tries to explain. "Like when scavageing animals eat fruit that has gone off."

"Oooh," the nymph says, understanding dawning. "And then they fall off the tree! That's amusing." She smiles again, and sniffs Alptraum a bit. "What do I need to do to hear the rest of your jokes?" she asks.

"If I told you the rest of them you would want to kill me," Alptraum claims. "But what I need is someone to take over a tree that right now turns dead babies into pod people. It exists in mists of madness. And don't look at me like that, Kaira, I'm not a travel guide!"

"It should turn dead babies into chestnuts," the nymph says. "Pods are for vines. It is clearly a misguided tree! What is madness? It is it the drunk thing?"

"No, it's more like being hit on the head far too many times," Alptraum tries to explain. "It's a bad and dangerous place, to be honest."

"Are there termites? Lumberjacks? Woodpeckers?" the nymph ask, getting into Alptraum's face again.

"No, there are more ... lots of blobby things with tentacles," Alptraum answers. He can't lean back any further without tipping over. "It's like a land of perpetual fog."

"And soft spiders?" the nymph asks, turning her head to give Alptraum a look with just one wide eye. "I like spiders. And squirrels. Can this tree make squirrels?"

"I ... honestly don't know. I don't know much about it," Alptraum admits apologetically. "All I know is it's name is 'Gol-Sotot' and it trades dead babies for live, soulless bodies. A rather nasty person is using it to produce these bodies to act as bombs, or worse."

"The Tree Without Soul!" the nymph squeals, right into Alptraum's face. "That's like.. like.. uh.. something." She bobs her head about in thought, along with twitching her tail. "Anyway.. it's an old tree. Or a god. A tree-god. And something about apples. Where is it?"

"Squealing at a bat is painful," Alptraum complains as he winces. "It's in a valley of mists northish of a city of my people.

"None that I saw. Just a lot of weird monsters. Even my people cannot go there. I can, but then I'm a freak," Alptraum notes.

"Who does go there then?" the nymph asks, and then presses herself up against Alptraum. "There are still horny, gullible men there, yes?"

"Not that I saw," Alptraum also has to admit. "Just the few that would bring the dead children.

"Maybe? Their minds are a bit gone," Alptraum says, looking cross-eyed. "Why is this important?"

"I'm a nymph," the nymph notes. "I'm not so old that I don't appreciate a little male attention every few years. It's been.. well, time is hard to tell in this place.."

"Most of the trees around me are my own children," the nymph notes. "You said there weren't many nearby trees.."

"Well, if you like being molested by tentacles you'll be in luck," Alptraum offers.

"Hmmm...." the nymph considers, pulling away from Alptraum slightly. "How would I get there?" she then asks.

"I would have to take you there ... somehow," Alptraum admits. He looks over at Kaira now.

"Getting her out of here could be done with the dagger," the dragon notes. "Just need a host. Either a medium, like Ravenia was, or something that doesn't have much of a defense, like an animal. Or a plant, possibly, given that it is a nymph. But it would probably have to be a tree, and those aren't easy to haul around.."

"Or she could poss ... oh wait, no, I'm not possess-able," Alptraum grumps. "But heh, I wonder if she could possess some natural-material jewelry I could just wear, then by proxy I could keep her bound there. It would be a twist on me escorting souls."

"Well.. who normally goes to bring the babies?" Kaira asks. "You mentioned a Naga? I'm pretty sure you need something that is alive to use as a host."

"A naga who works as a gravedigger, yes," Alptraum agrees. "You want me to put her spirit in him?"

"Or she could go inside one of the dead babies. Or the hog. Or ... hm," Alptraum ticks off. "Something inside the hog. I can manage to carry something inside one of those."

"Do you need the dead babies then?" Kaira asks. "Why not just the hog? Do they do anything to check that it's carrying something?"

"Well, it draws out what is inside the hog into the tree," Alptraum notes, "So the thing it draws out might be the best cargo for it."

"An actual piglet would be best, since that's alive," Kaira suggests. "You need a pregnant pig. One that's near to birthing."

"That is what they are trying to avoid getting. I'm not sure how to arrange that, but I may be able to. The first part of the chain is 'working' for me now," Alptraum says and shrugs.

"So that's plan A," Kaira suggests. "I can move Chesty here to one of the ready chambers for transfer. Uh.. you'd have to be able to reach into the hog to touch one of the piglets though to make it work."

"I can do that. I've put my hand in worse," Alptraum has to admit. "I might even just be able to do it with the shadow, but that might conflict."

"Keeping the dagger in your arm will let you use your clawtip to do it," Kaira says.

"Ahah, I can probably do that just fine," Alptraum admits. "How bad can it be to stick my arm that far up a pig?"

"Depends on if she's docile I guess?" Kaira asks, then shrugs. "I'm more familiar with the bacon aspect."

"Well, they have been doing it okay. They drug the sows first. I'm sure that makes it easier," Alptraum notes. He wiggles his hand. "And I can practice on you, Kaira."

"Within a day or two. I have to arrange the transport animal and such, then make sure it gets delivered," Alptraum explains as he quits leaning back so much now that the nymph isn't looming against him. "More than one day, less than three full days. Somewhere in there. I can give a more specific date once I know the transport hog is picked."

"All right!" the nymph says. "I'll wait!" And then she jumps back into the tree, so that only her tail shows.. and that slowly gets pulled in until it vanishes.

Well, except for the time that Alptraum just has to grab a hold of it and hang on it for a bit. Why? Who knows? It was big and fuzzy, and he's weird. It had to be grabbed.

"Look out," Kaira warns, before a giant falling nut can bonk the bat on the head.

Alptraum steps to the side in time. "What? It was a girl and I like getting tail," he jokes.

"So? Haven't you ever wanted to knock acorns with a kadie?" Alptraum counters, smirks, then steps away from the tree. "What have you been up to? You know what I have been up to for the most part."

"Organizing," Kaira says, and then gestures to the forest. "Still have a long way to go, as you can see. Souls tied to locations are hard to corral."

"To be organized!" the dragon claims. "Having everyone together makes it easier. Except for when groups despise one another. Sometimes I put them together just for amusement."

"Ah, so you're arranging orgies and debauchery-balls," Alptraum says as he nods knowingly. "A reasonable use of time."

"I don't arrange them," Kaira claims, putting a hand to her chest. "If they happen it's because of the participants. I taught some of the elves to play tennis. They turned it into a combat sport somehow.. but that at least makes it more interesting."

"Are you telling me you don't engage in any carnal pleasures with the inmates?" Alptraum asks as his white brow arches.

"I like my massages and grooming, but those are given as signs of respect," Kaira claims. "Anything more would be inappropriate.. and seen as political lobbying."

"Of course," Kaira says. "I'm just as bound by oaths as everyone else here. I'm not a tyrant. And besides, it's mostly stuck-up elf-lords and such."

"Or that I'm faithful," Kaira claims, flicking her tail tip up under Alptraum's chin. "But honestly, I could never put myself into a potentially compromising position with underlings."

"I have a bond with you, and I consider us to be partners," Kaira says. "Do you really think I manipulate you?"

"Sometimes I think you do, yes," Alptraum admits. "Intentional or not. I'm an old con artist, I can spot subtle attempts at it. You may not be aware you're even doing it. For example the picnic earlier to cheer me up is a form of manipulation. Granted it was for a good reason, to make me feel better, but ... anyway."

"Well, it also let me take a break from being surrounded by problems," the dragon notes.

"I know. I'm just ... tired, I suppose. I'm not trying to be mean I'm just commenting on my observations. I've been under a lot of stress," Alptraum admits.

The dragon wraps her arms and wings around Alptraum in a hug. "You probably need a break too," Kaira says.

"I need a lot of things these days," Alptraum admits as he sits on an old mossy log. "I should try to contact Rosalind sometime. I feel rather alone most days and I do worry I won't survive this."

"I am confident you'll survive," Kaira says, kneeling down before him. "You will have reason to, I believe."

"I'm not, truth be told. And I'm not sure I should survive," Alptraum admits. "You once expressed concern that I could end up like Vorgulremik. It's a real concern and I worry about it too. How many times does the hero end up the villain in time? How long before I do? I keep myself in check now, but will I forever? When will I cross that line and start forcing my will upon others beyond what is proper for the moment? Who's to say that Amena was not just once like me? Someone who started off meaning well ... then went too far. The world doesn't need another."

"There is a difference," Kaira says, and puts her hands on the bat's knees. "You have people who care about you to keep you in check. And they are the reasons you keep yourself in check too, I imagine. Vorgulremik was alone, because that is how his species is: every one of them is enemy to all others. You aren't like that."

"For how long? You haven't met many of my people. The people in Babel are ... questionable," Alptraum admits. "And I am the spawn of their deeds; debauchery with the half dead and magic."

"And you won't be staying with them," Kainudy says. "You'll inspire them to change. And you'll have your family waiting for you in Sylvania. The Sabaoth will move on, and not be corrupted this time."

"Until they call me back for other things. Or Gallis does something to finally push me over the edge and wipe that entire country out," Alptraum mutters.

"Do not imagine future crises to justify your actions now," Kaira advises. "That is a never ending spiral. You will outlive the Marquis, and his policies will die with him."

"You don't know that. He will brand me a monster, just as he has Rose. Just as he did her husband, right before he killed him," Alptraum points out.

"But that's all he can do," Kaira says. "It is up to the Chevaliers to gather their forces and try to claim the land. And they are less likely to throw themselves into the dragon's jaws after all others have failed."

"I'd honestly rather scare him so bad he can't see another shadow again without involuntarily wetting himself," Alptraum admits.

"Well, there's nothing wrong with that," Kaira says. "It's traditional for Gallisian rulers to go mad and have their heads chopped off, after all."

"Except it is a stepping stone. Each little act makes the next one easier. Then you get Aztepa," Alptraum points out. "The way to demon is paved with little stones."

"Then just choose to defend," Kaira says. "Rosalind has. She can be your anchor."

"I'm more worried that they'll go after my children. Cut off the line; they've tried it already with the killing of her husband and the death of her father," Alptraum says with a sigh. "And if they did, I can promise I will lay waste to that country in such a way as it would become a legend. There's a very easy way, too. I simply go there, then grab the Light with my right hand. You've seen how the two react."

"Let the Marquis know that you can reach his family easily then," Kaira suggests. "He dreams, I am sure."

"And this is what scares me, Kaira. This, right here. Knowing I would be willing to go that far without hesitation if he hurt my family," Alptraum says and shakes his head. "This is why I shouldn't survive this."

"Do you think anyone else would do less?" Kaira asks. "No, you need to survive this to protect them. Just because you are not there does not make your children targets. Once you see your children, things will change. They change everything.." she claims, then gets a momentarily confused look on her face.

"My father's actions killed a third of Babel in a pointless war partially because he was protecting me," Alptraum notes as he looks at the ground. "I understand it, I am capable of the same, and I know I would do it. It's a lot of power for just one person to have, particularly a flawed one."

"Power exists, and everyone is flawed," Kaira points out. "Would you trust it in any other hands? At least you have ultimate control over it."

"No, I wouldn't," Alptraum agrees. "And now I spend most of my time with distractions so I don't have to worry about all of this. If nothing else, the Sisters are good for distractions."

"You can be at times. But at least you don't always want something from me. Tonight you were just trying to cheer me up," Alptraum says.

The dragon perks up at that. "And it doesn't make me seem old and crotchety?" she asks next.

"But you still love me, don't you?" the dragon pries further, making big eyes at the bat.

"I happen to remember you telling me to not get attached to you," Alptraum points out.

Alptraum laughs. "I'm not even real to my own people," he notes, "And those I should be closest to, the followers of Sunala, want little to do with me."

"The Servants of Gods really prefer not to have those Gods come round for dinner," Kaira notes. "It undermines faith, I suppose. And also makes them feel a bit too.. redundant."

"Being told thank you, even just once in a while, helps," Alptraum notes. "I'm serious. I don't want to always feel like such a freak."

"Tricky things, thank yous," Kaira notes. "What is the protocol, for a Yodh to thank a member of their pantheon? 'Thank you' is an admission that one needed help - something the Yodh are trained to never admit too. It is also inadequate for the relationship. Too familiar. Yet to be kneel down and properly give thanks.. how would you react to that?"

"I would want a simple thank you. No protocol, no drama. Simple and honest. Protocol is for hiding true feeling and meaning," Alptraum points out.

"The Yodh are all about protocol," Kaira notes. "Maybe you should just.. tell them that it is alright? Or talk to Sunala about it."

"I know, I know. I'm being stupid, whiny, and expecting too much," Alptraum says in a burst of exasperation. "I can't explain quite what I feel, or what I want, for it to make proper sense. I have a lot to do, and the tree of exploding dead people to stop still. So I have to go make sure the Eeee who is the first of the chain get the right pregnant hog, and he's only doing that because of fear of me, and regret for his own actions."

"So, your reputation is out there," Kaira notes. "Still as an avenger instead of a redeemer for the most part?"

"I honestly don't know what people think of me, outside of if the escort of the dead has come, something is wrong," Alptraum points out.

"Well, that part is a natural assumption," Kaira notes. "You're in-between, a bridge between mortals and gods and dragons."

"If the Yodhgorphat shows up, people feel the need to bathe. If the Mave clone, people get horny, and so on," Alptraum points out and shrugs.

"Well, that's just masks and expectations," the dragon says. "That's what gods are for the most part. They generally don't have a lot of depth if they're going to be all relatable to."

"I know it's just ... this is why I feel lonely. And why I hide in distractions," Alptraum says and shrugs slightly. "Sometimes that honestly helps. Even the horrible things I go through at Gorphat's temple helps; it's ... a way to relax and for a time not feel like I have to be control of everything."

"I can sympathize," the dragon says. "Our roles aren't that different. We're trying to save people that may or may not deserve it, mainly because the alternative is the innocent suffering with the guilty if we don't."

"Yes, that is an appropriate way to describe it," Alptraum agrees. "Do you ever not want to be in control here? To be able to let go and let someone else take over for a bit?"

"I don't know if I can think like that," Kaira admits. "I do not have that choice. There is noone here that I can trust, or who would have the power to get things done. If I waver, then Vorgulremik gains strength."

"I can, and sometimes do," Alptraum says and shrugs slightly. "I'm not a dragon; I'm weaker than you, and Vorgulremik."

"Come to me when you feel the burden crushing you," Kaira says. "Or.. remind yourself of why you are here, and seek out Rosalind."

"Or she will be proud, and feel less alone knowing you are there with her," Kaira notes. "Even monsters need love and companionship. Well.. reasonable monsters do."

"Possibly, yes," Alptraum concedes. The Eeee pushes against his knees to help himself stand up, then stretch. "You're lucky in some ways, you know. You don't have to deal with feeling hopeless. You dragons never feel hopeless; you're always so sure you're right and will succeed."

"Our biggest vulnerability," Kaira notes. "Dragons and gods balance each other, but their egos are not so different."

"Sometimes you need that hubris to actually be able to succeed," Alptraum points out, "So that can be a great strength to have."

"You could do with a bit more self-confidence," Kaira concedes. "Maybe you should spend more time as a dragon, see if it helps? I imagine it's done something for Tulani."

"I don't want to lose me. For better or worse, I am important to me," Alptraum says. "I spend so much time as other people, with their wants, their desires, all clouding my mind and mood. It's ... hard to explain. I'm sorry."

"I can't imagine what that's like," Kaira admits. "You can be whoever you like.. but they aren't you when you're them, or similar?"

"Part of me is there, and part is aspects of the person the form was copied from," Alptraum tries to explain. "I'm aware of everything that is going on, and how I feel about it is a mix of me and the copy. It's not a bad thing, but it isn't entirely me. The intellectual part is me, the emotional part is the blend. It's how I can ... deal with the gender and attraction changes."

"And distract yourself," Kaira points out. "Because those people under the same stress?"

"I'm impressed, all the same," the dragon says. She taps the side of her head, and says, "I can barely deal with just one person in here."

"I grew up being an actor of sorts. You get used to having 'personalities' for a situation," Alptraum explains and shrugs. "Probably why it hasn't driven me insane."

"Really? I just assumed all mortals were insane, and that is why they could become whomever they needed to be for a given situation," Kaira says with a grin, and finally stands up as well. "Anything else you want to do while we're on break, as it where?"

"Sit, listen, and be," Alptraum says. "Ever just sit and listen to a rainstorm? Or the wind? The world around you is alive and there is so much all of us miss because we are just rushing about to this and that. Sometimes it is good to just listen to the world instead of everything running around in your head. It helps let stress fall away. Well, sometimes anyway. After that, who knows? It all depends on how I feel."