The White Knight's door is more easily usable once it had been removed from the jumble of dangerously churning and spinning machinery it had abutted, thus sparing the risk of getting mutilated or shredded outright upon coming out the wrong side. Of course, opening the door reveals a space quite unlike what should be on the immediate other side. It's a mark of how far the travelers have come from the normalcy of the Real World that this is no longer especially novel or bewildering (although Integra briefly experiments with the implications by sticking her arms around a door-post and trying to bring her hands together on the other side -- a task that is quite impossible, of course, since the hands protrude into two spaces that are non-contiguous on the other side of the post).
At first, it looks as if stepping through will take the heroes back to the familiar corridor they found past the White Rabbit's domain -- that this is the very same door where Achilles came ever-so-close to losing a hand if only he'd carelessly stuck one under the door to test the other side. And, indeed, it may very well be the same door ... but it is not long after they step through that it's evident that either the door has migrated, or the halls have rearranged themselves, or else something as basic as stepping from Point A to Point B does not mean that going from Point B takes you back to Point A again upon your return.
They also soon find that basic means of tracing their way back to the White Knight's door (in case of a need for retreat) fail: Integra's string that she had tied off back in the White Knight's house before stepping through, when she follows it, comes to a dead end at a blank wall -- and only once OBSERVED does the string end suddenly fall away from the wall, perfectly, smoothly cut off at the end. The White Knight was not exaggerating when he expressed that the Hall of Doors defies attempts to map it, or even to retrace one's steps.
It takes a certain gift to be able to use the Hall of Doors reliably ... yet for all its apparent randomness and occasional malice, and the seemingly infinite number of places it might take one, there is a suspiciously high incidence of places it will take you that are potentially useful and relevant, as well as those that are hazardous or perplexing.
At least, that's according to the White Knight's testimony. Right now, however, the Hall of Doors seems to just keep getting more and more bewildering, the more one proceeds, and so far the doors have opened into interesting yet seemingly not-quite-so-helpful places, many of which have no room even to enter: a wall of bricks with some rude (but rhyming) graffiti on it; a vast and raging subterranean inferno full of imps with pitchforks; a cloudy expanse full of endless sky both up and down; a medieval torture chamber with no apparent exit; a mass of screaming fish faces; a mass of squirming and packed earthworms; a starry and cold expanse full of distant shining clouds of vivid red and purple; a perfectly black and noiseless void.
As all pretense of up and down and right and left being differentiated falls apart, it might be evident why the Hall of Doors, as amazing as it may be, is not a transportation corridor of choice here (and why they haven't yet encountered any other travelers): It is very taxing upon one's belief in sensibility and grounding in common sense. Even the simple three dimensions seem inadequate for properly describing this space; what looks at first like a corner unfolds as one approaches it, revealing yet another passage invisible and presumably unreachable if one had taken a few steps to the right before approaching it.
It's a fortunate blessing that despite the fragmented nature of space, somehow they have been able to keep track of each other without having to resort to holding each other's hands the whole way. (Indeed, if that string is any indication, even hand-holding might not be proof against anything.)
"Thank goodness I'm not a mathematician," Griffin notes, after giving up on a keeping track of things. "Nor an architect."
Achilles "Ace" Johnson, meticulously making a map, comes on yet another corridor that crosses over one that they had previously explored. "Bah!" the card exclaims, wadding up that piece of paper and tossing it. "We would be better off using a forked twig and dowsing for the correct door."
"Or dip, dip, dot," Harrison adds.
"Actually, I think our difficulties stem from differing priorities," Griffin suggests. "Perhaps if we all focused on a single location, our chances of finding it would be better?"
As Griffin talks and walks, his next step takes him toward what looks like a door set in the floor. However, rather than stepping on the closed door, suddenly his surroundings seem to shift, and what was a wall a moment ago is now the floor, and the door is right-side-up from his point of view. This all happens without so much as a stumble.
The rocking wooden nightmare from the White Knight's toy room wobbles along with Integra, hauling along a large toybox on wheels. Despite being on rockers, it easily keeps pace. It seems to be no worse off at navigating the environment than anyone else.
Ace whispers to Harrison, "This is starting to remind me of tracking Griffin through the back aisle of the Sheepkeeper's." Out loud, he suggests, "So we should all concentrate on finding the Looking-Glass House, count off a minute of walking, and at the end of that time, we should come to a door that opens onto it?"
"Hmmm, I see the problem with this plan now," Griffin admits, pausing in his tracks. "Do any of us have a clear idea of what the Looking Glass House.. looks like?"
"And me without a teapot to smack him with," Harrison replies quietly. Louder, he agrees, "It seems a good a plan as any in this insanity. This reality isn't cricket; walls should only move like this if much whiskey was involved."
Achilles pauses, then peers at the rocking horse to see if it has some sort of capability to navigate on its own, or if it only ever moves at the will of its rider.
Integra says, "I suppose it's a house full of looking-glasses?"
The rocking-horse coyly keeps its secrets from Achilles -- at least insofar as a mere glance can discern. For now, it seems to be faithfully following Integra. Perhaps the White Knight was able to fix it properly this time.
"Well, it's no American Pony Express," the reporter concludes. "Else I would simply place a sticker 'To Looking-Glass House' upon the toy box and have it make a delivery."
Light comes from underneath the door nearest Griffin, briefly interrupted by a shadow. The light oscillates faintly, but there is no noise to hint at any activity on the other side.
This catches the bird's attention, and he holds a finger to his.. beak. "Shhhh, there might be someone on the other side of this door," he whispers to the others.
The card raises an eyebrow, but pauses obligingly.
"And this is means for fear because?" Harrison asks in a low voice.
Harrison finds at some point he has started walking down stairs. Off to his right is a sheer drop. From his point of view, he's looking forward to the top of the Gryphon's head ... and the Gryphon is standing on a fragment of a wall, yet not falling into the abyss.
Achilles whispers to Harrison, "I thought listening at keyholes was my job."
"Well.. we could knock and see if anyone answers?" Griffin suggests.
Integra gingerly makes her way along the floor/wall, trying to replicate her uncle's path, but instead she finds herself stepping up to and nearly onto another, different door. As with her uncle, the perspective rights itself, so that she's aligned with the door. She turns to look to her left, and sees her uncle (aligned on the same plane), but there is a conspicuous pit separating the respective walkways they stand on.
The little girl takes a sniff at the keyhole she's closest to. "I ... I smell chocolate cake!" she whispers loudly to the others.
"Your call, beaky," Harrison replies to Griffin. He's a bit occupied in not feeling vertigo. He also won't mention that he thinks he sees a feather bald spot on Griffin.
"Stay put, Integra," Griffin says, then tries to open the door he's next to for a peak.
Biting her lip and moving very, very slowly and gingerly, Integra puts her eye up to the keyhole. "It is!" she whispers loudly. "It's chocolate cake!" She takes a deep breath.
"Don't open that door, Integra. It could be a trap," Harrison tells the girl.
Through Griffin's keyhole can be glimpsed a marvelous underwater scene. Sunlight shimmers faintly down from above, while red herrings swim about. In the center of the scene, amidst the coral and seaweed and giant clamshells, is what looks like a great sunken treasure chest, with a figure in a diving suit standing right next to it. The fellow in the diving suit can't be getting on very well at all, considering that there is no air hose running to his helmet, but he appears to make no move to escape. A shadow of a great white snark briefly eclipses the scene. Considering that this is being viewed through a keyhole, it's a wonder the scene hasn't sprung a leak.
Achilles adds stiffly, "It's generally not done to go about taking others' chocolate cake, Miss Wingate." He glances up the stairs, looking for something like a looking glass.
"Well.. I think the cake door might be worth investigating more than this one," the gryphon notes.
Harrison realizes that the closest door to his position is actually above his head. Although it's in the wall next to him, like any normal door should be, it looks as if he would have to climb up the azure-tinted wallpaper, or make a good hop to reach the bottom of it -- and even then, there's no surface to stand on outside it to take a peek. Off to one side, there is a very strange oval portrait frame that seems completely dark, save for a wide, curling grin and an glimpse of eyes. Or was that just a trick of the light? Upon closer inspection, it is merely a tarnished old mirror.
"All right!" Integra agrees with her uncle, and she reaches for the doorknob. "I'll tell you what I find!"
"Wait!" Griffin chirps! "I just said it might be better than this door.. which is a fishbowl of some sort, I'm certain. You don't want to end up inside someone's cake!"
Achilles tries to navigate across to where Harrison is standing. Let's see. It should be a hop to the left, a jump to the right...
"I think the cat is keeping an eye on us," Harrison notes as he peers upward. "Also ... look at this. It's a mirror. Ever think that to get to the looking glass house it could mean using a mirror door?"
Integra suddenly stops at that thought. Apparently she doesn't relish the thought of being part of someone's dessert. She yanks her hand back away from the knob, mouthing a quiet "Oh!"
"I must agree, that sounds promising," Achilles says. "But is the mirror the door, or is the door next to it the door?"
And figuring that he may as well try ... Harrison tries to reach over and poke the tarnished mirror.
With surprising ease, Achilles has made it to the same staircase as Harrison! But ... something's wrong. The way Harrison is standing on the stairs from his point of view is impossible. The stairs don't BEND that way.
Deciding that relying on surfaces just isn't the way to go, Griffin tries to flap his way over to his niece.
Suddenly, Harrison's perspective shifts around. One moment, Achilles just looks like he's about to fall off the stairs. Next, Harrison is touching the mirror, but he's ... elsewhere. The door just above his head has been replaced by ... another, LARGER door above his head, but off to one side, and further up.
To everyone else, Harrison popped into one mirror ... then popped out of another. Depending upon one's viewpoint, he's either higher up the zig-zagging staircases, or down the corridor.
Harrison rubs his head. "I think my brain hurts. This is crazy," the hare mutters. "It was sure a hare-brained scheme to touch the mirror."
Achilles grits his teeth. "This is the last time I suggest using the Hall of Doors to get somewhere quicker," he promises himself. He calls out, "Harrison? Where'd you get to, old hare?"
"So, we must stick to doors then," Griffin notes, trying to fly to Integra.
Integra glances left, then right. "I see him!" she reports. "Oh my!" She looks around for a mirror of her own, but there are none to experiment with within reach -- at least, not before her uncle catches up with her and the rocking horse.
Instead of touching the mirror again, Harrison tries to listen at a nearby door. Travel by mirror doesn't seem particularly reliable.
Next to Achilles is a very, very tall and narrow door. Or maybe it's just narrow and not particularly tall. In any case, it doesn't seem to have been accessible from Harrison's previous angle of alignment.
Ace tries a slip of paper with a stick figure head drawn upon it beneath the door to see if anything mangles the paper, with the intention of peeking beneath it himself afterward.
For Harrison, reaching the nearest door is a bit tricky. It looks like it's set in a ceiling, but as he gets closer with the intent of approaching it, suddenly his sense of orientation shifts. For only the briefest of moments he feels the reflexive urge to regain his balance, but when he does, he finds that what was a wall is now a floor, and what was a ceiling attic door is now a door right-side up.
"Ow," Harrison mutters and tugs his ears down. He eyes that door, then listens to it first. He's not going to risk a poke in the eye through a keyhole quite yet.
"Through the door and into the hall, where up instead of down one may fall," Griffin rhymes. "Somewhere here is the door through which we must pass - to take us to the House of the Looking Glass."
Through the door, Harrison's keen hearing picks up the distinctive noise of gyring and gimbling in the wabe, and a rustling of tum-tum tree leaves in a light spring breeze. He also catches a faint hint of the smell of strong cheese.
"I hear leaves and smell cheese," Harrison remarks loudly. So now he tries to peer through keyhole; if it has one.
With a sacrificial piece of paper, Achilles tests the tall narrow door. Nothing is shredded! So far, so good. He hears the sound of ... sliding cloth and soft footsteps?
Harrison spies through the keyhole: There is a forested clearing, in the middle of which is a solitary sundial. The earth at its base is recently disturbed, and it looks as if some small animal might have created a burrow there. A light breeze carries the distinctive scent of cheese for a moment. Several slithy badger-like creatures with corkscrew noses and tails gyre and gimble about. A distant and ominous burbling can be heard through the trees.
Meanwhile, from Achilles's view throught the tall, narrow door: A room on the other side of the keyhole looks like a balcony of some exotic palace of the Orient, overlooking a silvery landscape under a starry night sky. Far above, the moon looks curiously blue and marbled. Before that can be examined further through the limited vantage-point of the keyhole, there is a flutter of cloth. A tall and narrow figure robed in jade green moves up to a work table surrounded by numerous herbs and large chunks of what might be ... green cheese? With her back to the keyhole, the woman (a sorceress? a princess?) begins working with a great oversized mortar and pestle, grinding down the ingredients for ... something. She raises a pale hand to wipe at her brow, and then it is evident that she has a pair of long ears -- rabbit ears! She moves, and the marbled moon can be seen again. It looks rather like a globe, with a swirl of white marbled clouds, and strange land-masses.
"There's a forest over here, and a sundial!" Harrison cries out. "And an animal burrow. It looks safe."
"Can you tell if it's the Tulgey Wood?" Griffin calls to the hare. "That's right next to the Looking Glass House, more or less or morely lessly, as the case be not."
Through Harrison's door, he can hear some outgrabing going on -- and then some distant whiffling and burbling.
Withdrawing his head, the reporter rubs his eyes, not entirely certain what he saw. "Well, I feel safe in saying that we shouldn't go through this door unless we wish to go to the Moon," he says. "Or at least the Oriental depiction thereof. Though perhaps Harrison might find the Rabbit in the Moon of interest... if he has a taste for women in mysterious robes."
"How would I know if it is the woods or not? What should I look for?" Harrison calls out. He now even takes a risk and opens the door to peer through it.
"Awrk.. how can a robe be mysterious?" Griffin ponders. "Well, look for... ah borogroves and.. bandersnatches and such."
The door opens and ... the slithy toves dive into a burrow underneath the sundial in the beautiful glade. A cool spring breeze wafts through the hare's fur, and warm sunlight filters down between the leaves. Burble goes something in the woods. The mop-like borogoves pick up their stilt-like pace as they make for the tree-line. Some greenish-looking pig-like creatures snuffle at the air curiously. Mome raths?
"Weird pig things are here. Mome raths? That's the weird phrase I keep thinking of when I spot them. And the woods are burbling," Harrison calls back. He scratches at one of his long ears and he peers through the door frame.
"I suspect she's either an Oriental princess or perhaps one of their witches... What did they call them? Sorceresses? In either case, the robes are a mystery to me, but I imagine, not to her." Achilles peers. That mirror where Harrison disappeared to looks just within reach if he were to reach down from the edge of the stairwell, perhaps. He gets down on all four and then tries to touch it.
"Burbling? Don't Jabberwock's burble?" Griffin asks, sounding concerned.
While he's there, Griffin takes a peek through the Chocolate Cake door keyhole for himself.
A moment later, Achilles pops out of a mirror in the floor/wall (depending on one's view). After a momentary disorientation, he makes his way next to Harrison. Somehow, they've ended up aligned the same direction for a change. Another springtime breeze blows through the open door, bringing a strong smell of cheese and tove-musk to Achilles's nose.
Adjusting his fake mustache and monocle, Achilles gets up to greet Harrison. "So, you've found some woods? Any guess as to where they might be?" He peeks through himself.
Griffin, meanwhile, gets a beak/nose full of chocolate aroma. Oh. It ... it smells delightful. It's FRESH. It's all he can do to resist the urge to pop the door open right now.
"Not a clue. What do I look like, a woodland creature?" March asks.
WHIFFLE. Whatever thing made that noise must be large. Perhaps just beyond those trees.
Achilles peers critically at March. "Yes."
"Oh.. my," Griffin notes after the sniff. "Let us.. ah, relocate," he tells Integra, and starts moving - morely or lessly - in the direction of the other men, further up-over-near the stairs.
March glares at Achilles for a moment. "So, do we risk going into the glade? What is making those weird noises?" he asks. "And can we wedge the door open so we can escape back if we need to?"
Achliles frowns thoughtfully. "Wait... I think I know this... Something about a snicker-doodle snack and a jabber cookie..." He pauses. "Maybe I need something to eat."
As Griffin makes his way past more doors to reach the others, he catches a few aromas on the way. The first odor is foul and fetid, like that of a dog that is panting and breathing happily into the face of its master after nosing around in something unhealthy. The next odor is a complete contrast -- the aroma of flowers, roses, fresh morning dew.
This flowery perfume gives the bird pause, and he peeks through the keyhole it seems to emanate from.
"Jabber? As in a Jabberwock? The horrible, dangerous, monsters?" Harrison asks. Soon, his left foot is tapping on the stairs. "So, maybe not this door either, eh?" he notes.
It comes back to all of them simultaneously for some reason (well, all except Integra): There are at least two Tulgey Woods to be found in Wonderland, and who-knows-how-many wabes. (But given the extreme convergence of signs here, this is probably THE Tulgey Wood -- one or the other -- through the door.) In Alice's "plays," originally she imagined Tulgey Wood to be in some sort of land in between the land of the Cards from the first book, and that of the Chessmen from the second. However, much later, details in the Hunting of the Snark hinted that the Tulgey Wood might actually be on the very same far-away island where the heroes looked for the snark ... and encountered a fearsome boojum snark instead.
In either case, the jabberwock is a fearsome creature, and the Tulgey Wood an especially hazardous place, not to be braved without a strong heart -- and preferably with a very vorpal blade.
But then ... didn't the Jabberwock lose its head already?
March's foot thumps louder on the stairs. "While this may be close to our intended destination, it seems a little dangerous to use," the hare points out. "Should we look for some place closer to the Looking Glass House?"
The reporter opens up his banana and gnaws on it thoughtfully while considering the scene. "Jabba-wookie?..." (swallows lump of banana) "Jabberwocky! That was what I was trying to remember. And the Jabberwocky lived in the Tulgey Wood, which is... is..." He tries to remember the old text. "This is actually a very tasty banana."
Floral scents and the smell of freshly-cut grass exude from the keyhole where Griffin spies. Beyond, there is a great garden on a bright, early-summer day. Several Flowers are lined up, giddily chatting amongst themselves and giggling as they preen and check themselves in hand-mirrors (or petal-mirrors, as the case may be). At the head of the line is a great gilded guillotine, ornately worked with symbols of the four suits of cards, but most prominently featuring a great heart shape on its blade. A Rose checks herself one last time before popping herself into the guillotine. It comes down with a clean slice, and her body goes limp. Some Card gardeners dutifully carry the now-still rose bloom up to a great royal bouquet that is being prepared -- no doubt for the royal palace. What an honor! Small wonder the Flowers are so excited.
"Ugh.. not this door either," Griffin notes, and covers the keyhole while gesturing for Integra to hurry past. "The stairs branch ahead, let's keep to the.. right?"
"You're obsessing on that banana," March remarks a bit dryly, "Maybe you should stop eating it and focus on the danger at hand, hmm?"
Integra blinks, snapping herself out of a reverie, and looking worried at her uncle's expression (somehow she can still read it just as well as when he was human), but she complies and rushes along.
The gryphon also snorts out of his nostrils to clear out the last of the fragrance. "Hold your breath too, Integra," he advises. "This is much worse than the cake lure; it makes you feel fine with.. serving the Queen in a terminal manner."
Achilles gives March big sad card eyes. "I was hungry!" He considers. "Am I remembering right that the Tulgey Woods were actually close to the Looking-Glass House?"
"Yes, yes, it is!" the jittery hare agrees, "But it also has BIG NASTY MONSTERS WITH LARGE POINTY TEETH!" He waves his arms frantically, then even mimes big pointy teeth!
The reporter looks at Harrison. "What's your point?"
Whiffle? There is a sound of something loud and large sniffing, just beyond the treeline. A shadowy form can be made. It's rather pudgy. Big belly, long neck, spindly arms ... LOOOOOONG claws. It looks as if those jaws could bite, and those claws could catch. The mome raths squeal in alarm and dash away, crashing into the underbrush.
"The point is we are small, and probably tasty," Harrison points out.
Meanwhile, as Griffin keeps to the right, the smell of the ocean is the first thing to reach his senses, upon approaching the next keyhole. With a quick peek, through the keyhole can be seen a sky set ablaze by sunrise or sunset -- it's impossible to tell immediately just which -- as a dark ocean stretches out to the horizon. The viewpoint bobs, and the creaking of timbers can be heard. To one side, there is a glimpse of rigging. Perhaps the door opens out onto the deck of some small sailing vessel?
Achilles ponders. "You make a very good point. All right, I'll hold you up for bait, when it charges through the door, it'll slip on the banana peel that I'll deposit here, and then we go through while it's distracted. Sounds like a plan?"
"You have lost your mind," Harrison blurts. "I am not bait! Plus, where is Mr. Beak? Don't we need him too?"
The reporter sighs. "Complications, always complications." He looks around for the wayward griffin.
The THING on the other side of the clearing makes a very loud BURBLE noise. It sounds distinctly menacing and very hungry.
Across-over-under from the other stairs, Griffin calls out, "I've found a boat, or possibly a very small floating island, likely on the Endless Sea. What are you two bickering about over there?"
"Griffin, get your feathery tail here!" Achilles says, "I do believe we've found the door to the Tulgey Woods."
"Which one?" Griffin calls back.
The reporter turns to Harrison. "All right, whether we like it or not, I think luring it in here and then jumping through and locking it in here is our best chance to evade it. Unless your monkeywrench is also a vorpal wrench?" He gauges the path it's going to have to take, should it charge us, and tries to figure out where to situate the banana peel.
Selecting a spot, Achilles plants the peel and gets ready to duck behind the wall. "What do you mean which one? Where we're standing!"
"No, my wrench is decidedly not vorpal! Maybe I can just shoot it ... if the peel doesn't do its slick trick and send the monster for a trip!" Harrison babbles, nervously, but at least he doesn't seem like he's ready to bolt."
"I mean, is it the one near the House, or the one on the other side of the mountains or the one on Snark Island. Can you see the House?" Griffin calls, preparing his rifle because.. well, because.
Achilles whispers to Harrison as the hare readies his revolver, "You might want to step back a bit. Its claws might catch you as it flails."
The banana peel, surprisingly, doesn't seem to be lying in place like an ordinary banana peel should. It's ... vibrating.
"Right, ah..." the hare agrees as he steps backwards towards Achilles.
"BURRRRRRBLE!" roars the Jabberthing. It charges toward the doorway! As Harrison steps away, he can distinctly see a LACK of Jabberkin behind the standing door, even though his ears tell him that it's nonetheless on its way.
"RRRRRRRRRBBB -- rrr?" As the Jabberthing crashes into the door frame, which is evidently far too small to actually let it through, its foot-claw goes through and steps RIGHT on the vibrating banana peel. The foot goes flying, sending the banana peel launching -- but the peel keeps bouncing and flopping around, going through the door. Even as the Jabberthing tries to get its footing, the banana peel is always right under the claw, then the other one, then somehow both at once. "BU-RRR-BLE?!" the Jabberthing whiffles as it falls again, struggles up, slips, falls once more. The banana peel seems to EXPLODE in a burst of slippery action, until the Jabberthing is left lying on the ground, just on the other side of the door, looking quite gazed and wall-eyed as its individual googly eyes bobble around in different orientations.
Achilles pauses, seeing the creature entirely blocking the door. "Curse my lack of depth perception!" he gripes. "It's too big to fit through!"
"Right! It's big and ugly. I think it should also be blessed and holey!" Harrison quips as he aims for the beast's head! "I think if we ever get back I have a new idea for a carnival game. Shoot the Jabberwok head..." he mutters, then fires!
The bullet finds its mark on the thing's head. If it were a reasonable size, it would most assuredly be dead in one blow ... but not only is this thing especially large, but it seems to also possess a surprisingly thick skull (and precious little room, scale-wise, for a brain inside).
"This had better be worth not just closing that door!" Griffin caws, as he flaps over to the other stairway and tries to hit the where Harrison was shooting as well.
Achilles looks surprised as the shot has little effect on the already-stunned Jabberkin. "By Jove, that thing's harder-headed than our old Sergeant," he exclaims.
Astoundingly, the rifle, despite landing a very solid hit, seems no more effective than the gun. Both shots create wounds, that is, but it seems as if nothing "important" was hit, if such a thing were possible.
"Uhm, maybe we should just close the door," Harrison whimpers. Even his ears wilt.
"Might as well be shooting at a barn," Griffin grumps. "A barn with teeth."
The creature snaps out of it. Its eyes seem to burn as if with flame. No, seriously. They begin burning.
Achilles snorts. "It's between us and the Tulgey Woods, and that's as close a door as we're likely to find. Nothing stops us as true servants of Her Majesty!" He pauses as its eyes start burning, then brings his umbrella up and hunkers down a bit. The flames do worry him. "Right. Try and stun it again, and then I'll charge it and push it out of the way with my old brolly, and then we'll run for it."
EYES OF FLAME burn as they gaze balefully upon the two creatures just outside of its reach. Instinctively, Achilles flips himself, like a card-snap trick, but in the very same moment, he sweeps up Harrison with his brolly, shielding him from the flames.
THAT ... was a close one.
A candelabra on a nook next to the staircase is completely melted. Wax drips upward toward the floor/ceiling.
"Right, go for the eyes," Achilles suggests as he sets Harrison back down, within the shelter of his brolly. "If it can't see us..."
"Shoot? Shouldn't we close the door?" the hare frets! Still if his friend believes this is the way we must go ... He crouches down and aims around the bumbershoot, targeting the beasts eye. "Please, please work," he mumbles.
"We have to stun it again! I'm out of banana peels," gripes Achilles.
What would have been an easier shot a moment ago is now all the harder that the creature has focused its full flaming gaze upon the two heroes, rather than sprawling on banana peels. The shot just misses.
"Griffin! Have you got a banana left?!" yells the card from behind his umbrella. He peers over the edge of the Imperial Paragon to see the jabberkin unscathed.
"Yes, and you want me to throw it a fire-brea.. gazing monster?" Griffin asks in amazement. Still, there's not much point in shooting at the thing. So the gryphon pulls out the banana, peels it, and throws the peel at the door.
As the banana peel sails overhead, Achilles braces himself. "Close the door or charge it?" he hisses to the others. "If we want to get into the Tulgey Woods from here, we're going to have to get around it somehow."
The banana peel slips from Griffin's hand, and there's a brief and frightful moment when he juggles it with one hand, then the other, then finally knocks it toward the door. It sails on through, and the Jabberthing, eyes full of flame and ready to give it another go, suddenly looks alarmed. Its head slams into the ground, and its feet go flying on the other side. The banana is on the loose! It burbles angrily as it keeps tumbling and fumbling, unable to get back up.
"Close it! Maybe it'll go away and we can sneak through later! It's better than DYING!" Harrison yells.
Achilles braces himself, then charges up the stairs to shut the door on the dreadful thing! "For Queen and country! And not ending up flambe and charcoal!"
Fortunately, the banana peel somehow does NOT get underfoot. The door closes. Eye-flame smoke billows out, along with the faintly fading odor of strong cheese ... and then all is quiet. The door stays closed.
The card slumps against the door. "Phew."
The door suddenly pops open. Wait. It didn't open INWARD a moment ago!
Griffin eats his banana, and says, "I am certain that the next door will lead someplace useful."
The Card deftly catches himself on the frame. The scene on the other side is completely different. The musical sounds of a slightly-out-of-tune calliope drift through the doorway, intermixed with the shouts of barkers, the squeals of children, and the laughter of clowns. The scents of buttered popcorn, boiled peanuts and assorted sweets waft on a faint breeze. Dazzling lights and curiosities hint at a great carnival midway at night.
Achilles peers surprisedly. "What in the world... or out of it..."
"Maybe we should just give up and let Alice kill us," Harrison grumbles. "It just keeps getting worse. first a Jabberwock, now clowns."
Integra sniffs at the air. "Caramel apples?"
"Ah, but people we can ask directions from," Griffin notes. "See if.. do you smell flowers?" he then asks, looking uncertain.
The reporter's stomach rumbles. "I don't know about you, but that popcorn and those peanuts are smelling awfully good right now." He tries to recall if this might be somewhere that appears on the map.
"Smells. Nice smells are traps," the gryphon squawks in alarm.
"I don't smell any flowers," Achilles says. He sniffs the air again. "Hmm. Caramel apples, spun taffy, horses and animal droppings. Not, I hasten to add, a flavor combination that I would exhort any readers to attempt."
"I don't trust it," Griffin insists. "We don't want to go to a carnival anyway."
The card sniffs again. "Is that the River Thames?" He peers at the people, trying to discern if they are all human, or if there are Animals, Cards, Chessmen, and other such about.
"Why not? It's better than being cooked," Harrison points out.
The shapes are hard to make out. Some are unnaturally tall, but ... those could be clowns on stilts. And that one is short and squat, but -- oh yes, people DO come in that shape on occasion. The lighting is frustratingly bad. Perhaps if Achilles were to get CLOSER, he might get a better look....
"The wabe looked friendly too, I wager," Griffin claims, shaking his head. "We can't trust that door."
Achilles considers. "It could be ocean. If it's the Endless Sea, it's pretty much the opposite side of the map from where we wanted to be," he says. "Which, come to think of it, makes sense since we opened this door the opposite way of the way it usually does."
Harrison slinks up to the door to peer through now and try to guess where they are. His fuzzy nose quivers.
"Aha!" the gryphon crows, noticing something off about that door. "See, it's disappointed! It wants you to go in and get eaten!"
The card gives Griffin a funny look, then moves around to try and see what he's seeing.
"That door opened by itself," Griffin points out. "The wrong way! It's a trick! Just come away and we can try another one."
Calliope sounds. Children squealing -- but also one crying, and a mother scolding him. Shadows of men (?) in top hats. A barker up on a stage, promising secrets of the exotic Orient -- not for the children, please. A lion's roar. The bang of cymbals and cursing of some man playing a game and losing.
"I think it is London," Harrison remarks. "It speaks of the secrets of the Orient; which makes no sense in Wonderland. We should try another door."
Harrison doesn't catch sight of any animal-people or card-people or chessman-people ... that he can tell. But the lighting is particularly bad, and the sound so cacophonous. The whole thing seems inherently hard to make out. It couldn't be more vague if it tried. But then, that about describes a carnival, too.
"I have no desire to return to London, hopping," March adds.
"London?!" Integra cries out, as she scrambles to find a way closer. "Mum!"
"We can't go back until Alice is dealt with, remember?" Griffin says, and once Integra reacts, he shouts, "CLOSE THAT DOOR!"
Achilles peers at the door frame and the other side of the door, looking for decorations on the door that might be contorted into faces, or perhaps a painted face on the other side. "I imagine I would be folded immediately and then mailed to Her Majesty's spies for immediate use as a device of infiltration, should I be caught in London," the card admits. "I think Tulgey Wood is our best bet, since we have no idea what the Looking-Glass House looks like, but we need a way to beat the Jabberwocky."
Harrison tries to close the door!
The catbird takes flight after his wayward niece!
The door closes without effort. There's a momentary clatter, as if something were hanging on the other side, and the Card gets a glimpse of steps just on the other side, as if this were the door to a wheeled gypsy wagon. But then it goes silent again.
"Note to self, no leaning on doors," the reporter mutters.
Griffin easily catches Integra before she can reach the door. In any case, the way that the noise has suddenly gone quiet makes it very clear that whatever was there isn't quite there anymore. Integra stops and drops to her knees. She balls up her hands into fists and covers her eyes, sobbing quietly.
The rocking nightmare-horse and its rolling toybox wagon wobble to a stop right behind Integra.
Scooping up the girl in his arms, Griffin coos soothingly to her. "We'll get you home, don't fret. But that was just a teasing door. It would have gone someplace horrible. We can't trust anything that seems too good."
"I'm sorry, Uncle! I don't ... I just wish we'd wake up. This isn't fun anymore. Mr. Johnson and Mr. March almost got burned up!" Integra collapses against her uncle. The toy nightmare just wobbles in place patiently.
"I know what we should be looking for," the bird claims next. "A normal looking house, save for something reversed, like a clock-face. A mirror of Alice's old house."
Achilles peers back to the front side of the door. "Another door, or try and sneak past the Jabberwocky, once it's forgotten about us?" he asks of the others. "Pssh, don't worry about it, my Imperial Paragon brolly is good against all manners of fire and other harmful elements of nature!"
"I vote for another door," Harrison admits. "Why can't we find a place with welcoming people on the other side?"
The gryphon points his beak towards the next door beyond the ship-at-sea door, along the other staircase. "Let's poke at that one," he suggests.
"We can, but they might be welcoming us to our doom," Achilles points out.
Integra wipes her eyes and nods. "Mmm-hmm," she says with a quiver to her voice, then straightens up, makes a "Come along!" gesture to the toy rocking-horse, and follows Uncle Griffin toward the next strange door.
Leaning down, Griffin peeks through the keyhole.
Through the door is a misty London street -- or, perhaps, a Wonderland street that just LOOKS like London, which is quite possible based on the last city they visited. Across the street, through the fog, can be made out a shop. It looks ... familiar. A haberdashery shop. It's Madden's shop. It's night time, and the lights are out, though there's a faint glow visible behind the silhouettes of hat displays and wooden head models. Perhaps the lamp is burning back in the work-room.
Achilles trundles after the others, recollecting himself and folding his umbrella up again so it won't get in the way as he walks.
Harrison is content to just sit on the steps and hold his head for a bit.
As Achilles makes his way across the expanse to reach Griffin, up and down switch a couple of times, and along the way he finds himself passing one of the larger doors. The keyhole just happens to be at eye level at his relative size. Through it, he catches a glimpse of what looks like a hedge maze on a warm summer day. The greenery looks just a LITTLE too perfect to be anywhere in the Real World.
"Not the Looking Glass House," Griffin reports. "Another street, could be anywhere. One of the cities, or back home: how well do either of you recall Madden's haberdashery?"
"What, hey!" says the card as he catches a sight of greenery, then steps back to peer carefully through the keyhole. "Now here's something."
"I am, but going to his shop is a bad idea; especially here. Remember, he died and because evil," March points out and looks up. "Well, evil from our perspective anyway, since he'll likely try to kill us."
Upon a second glance, Achilles gets a glimpse of a hedge maze ... and flowers. Flowers, and lots of flowers. Some of them are whispering, some quietly singing. The maze looks faintly disorienting -- it's impossible to follow the way the paths twist and go, just by looking at them from a distance. There's a sense that, like the Hall of Doors, space is a little bit twisted up in that place.
"What is it, Ace?" Griffin asks.
Achilles studies the scene. "A hedge maze... A big one, and I see flowers. Wasn't there something like that in the book?"
"There was one next to the House I think," the gryphon says, but frowns (with a beak, no less). "Full of flowers, isn't it? Flowers are dangerous. But maybe it means we're getting close. Find another door near that one."
For Integra, this door Achilles has just found is a FLOOR feature, so she doesn't seem to notice it. Instead, she wanders over toward a roll-top desk while her uncle appears to be occupied. She walks around it, peering at it curiously, but clearly having the sense not to touch a thing.
Achilles points out, "Flowers are generally a bit more hospitable than Jabberwockies. I'll keep an eye on this door and make sure it doesn't wander off."
Judging by the floral scents coming from the door and the faint whispers of flowers lounging in their beds, it seems as if merely looking away doesn't make the door lose its destination -- not yet, anyway.
"I can charm flowers," Harrison points out. He decides to get up and check the door nearest to the one that contained the jabberwock.
"Let's not take too long in looking for alternatives," Achilles says a bit impatiently. "If we hadn't dithered for so long, we could have snuck through into Tulgey Woods and gotten away from the Jabberwocky. A little walking won't kill us, you know. It's the things we bump into while walking that might."
"Can you charm a maze though?" Griffin notes, and notices Integra's curiosity about the desk, so goes to investigate it. Maybe it'll have a direction-giving frog inside or something..
Finding the door nearest the one that contained the forest "wabe" and then the carnival involves going up a twisting flight of stairs. What seemed like a misplaced set of tiles on the wall becomes a jutting floor when viewed from another point of view, and at last another plane of reference entirely. A small narrow door is to be found. A quick check through the keyhole follows, though Harrison's ears pick up a hint of sound first: He hears a multitude of clocks. As he peers through, the view confirms his suspicions. It looks like a hall of clocks upon clocks upon clocks. All sorts of clocks. Grandfather clocks. Intricate little cuckoo clocks. Musical clocks. Big wooden unreliable-looking ancient wooden contraptions. Spring-wound monstrosities. And then something that drips water?
"I have found the hall of time," March calls to the others. "Clocks, clocks, clocks."
"And three blind mice?" wonders Achilles. He ventures to paper-slip test, then peek under the frame of the door to see if they'd be stepping out into somewhere hostile. Such a large door, what could it appear as in the maze?
Integra investigates another door, going up a short flight of stairs. "I found ... I think this is the snug room where this all started!"
"Or the reflection of it?" Griffin asks the girl, then goes to check for himself.
When Achilles pokes under the door for a better look, nothing gets him. Nothing got the test-slip, either. Yes, it's really a hedge maze on the other side. It's not winter, either. It looks like a pleasant summer day. It looks as if the door on the other side opens into a house somewhere near the flower maze. That is, if it didn't ACTUALLY open into the Hall of Doors.
As the card pulls his head back, he calls to Griffin, "Yes, yes, we get it, if we actually managed to find the Looking Glass House, it'd be reflected. But I think we're going to be very hungry before we succeed in finding a door that opens right into it. I hope you have plenty of ingredients on hand, because otherwise we may be eying one another for particularly tasty cuts. I'm safe, I'm paper."
With a quick check, Griffin is able to verify that this is the MIRROR version. No, this doesn't seem to be a link back to the Real World. It looks untouched from the mess that was left there, including the broken glass. Surely in the Real World, someone would have tidied that up by now.
Just past the Snug Room door ... the corridor twists and rolls into a long straight continuation of many doors and doors and more doors. It looks like this particular passage must head into a slightly more contiguous part of the Hall of Doors.
"You just had a banana," the gryphon notes, and says, "This door leads to the mirror version of the snug room back at the inn."
"It might be inside the Looking Glass House," Griffin suggests.
Achilles points out, "My appetite is sated for now, but... How many doors are in this hall? And how many possible places could they go? The least bit of understanding of probability would tell you that we're lucky to have found two doors to spots just one square off from the Looking-Glass House."
Integra braves the spiralling hallway, finding that gravity conveniently goes wherever her feet are. "Uhm. A kitchen. With not-friendly utensils here." She walks along. "A castle balcony!" A little further. "A very, very tall forest!" A little more. "A bridge ... made out of a rainbow!" And further. "EEEE! An eyeball looking -- oh ... wait. It's just a mirror on the other side."
The card is sounding increasingly impatient.
"Ace, did you find something close? Right now we need to just take close and go with it. Expecting to be perfect means we'll die of old age here," March calls out.
"I've found what I think is the Living Flower Maze," the card calls back to Harrison.
"Integra has found a mirror," Griffin relays.
"And that maze sounds more appealing than being eaten by ol' flame-eyes," March remarks.
"It's a maze, with no more chance of us navigating it than these confounded halls you know," the gryphon argues.
Achilles points out, "Says the one who can fly. Are you with me, Harrison?"
"Integra, don't wander off," Griffin calls.
"Fine, then, Griffin, stay in this hall of hells and wander forever looking for the perfect door. Meanwhile, I'll be at least out of here are trying to move on," March calls out. He's now trying to backtrack the stairs and find some way over to Ace.
Achilles waves to the rabbit, to give him a landmark to navigate toward.
Integra pouts, then comes back ... but she looks through keyholes on the OTHER side on her way back. "A gingerbread house made of candy! I'll bet there's a witch." ... "Uhm ... a giant chessboard! With rivers! And trees." ... "Lots of books. A library!" ... "Another garden? Lots of roses. And I hear bells." ... "A big block of ice! There's a furry elephant in it." ... "Uhm ... a giant pile of giant toys? In a closed toy box."
Harrison seems to be getting the knack of changing points of reference to make more convenient use of his surroundings. It's just a matter of stepping up on the wall and suddenly it's a floor, and so forth. There's hardly a need to climb stairs when one step to the side and suddenly it's a level field. There's little sense in thinking about how many laws of physics this violates.
The card braces himself. It feels strange to be opening a door that's on the floor, but once Harrison is close enough to lend a hand, he opens the Flower Maze door cautiously, letting in a gust of perfumed air.
"When a place such as this becomes eaiser to navigate, I think it's time to worry about one's sanity," Harrison remarks once he's within reach of Achilles.
As they approach the door, it's no longer on the floor to them, however. Somehow, the walls have folded around, and the door seems right-side-up from the perspective of Harrison and Achilles. The door opens, and nothing attacks, nothing whiffles, nothing burbles. The flowers continue their whispering. Just on the other side of the door is a small wooden platform and a set of steps down to a grassy, well-kept lawn. Beyond is a picket fence and a garden trellis marking the transition into the garden beyond. At first, there are perfectly normal flowers, but as one progresses one's view, the flowers give way to Flowers, and the seemingly normal surroundings become more Wonderlandish.
"We're storybook characters in a world someone's trying to take over by rewriting the story her way, I think we're a little past that point," Achilles says. He steps into the other side and looks around the other side of the door to see what might be seen.
"Alright, I'm going to check quickly and see if this door really leads to the inn, or just the room as would be seen through the mirror," Griffin says. "Hold the door for me, Integra," he asks the girl before opening it.
In the hazy, faintly blue-tinged distance, up on a great hill can be made out the parapets of a great castle city, of an impossible size such as is only seen in fairy tales. Other towers rise in the distance, looking like enormous chess pieces lined up in their starting positions -- white chess pieces, but even further and fainter in the distance can be seen the red pieces on the other side, quite some journey away.
The other side of the door Achilles opened reveals the side of a house -- a nice country house in a well-kept estate, obviously owned by someone with greater means than Mr. Johnson or anyone he deals with.
"Hello! I think we've struck the motherlode," Achilles says, looking around. "This could well be the house we're looking for."
"You see a house?" Griffin asks, midway through the door.
"Well, this looks safe. Certainly safer than the wabe," Harrison says as he breathes a sigh a relief. "I say we take this one and see where things go. It's the chessman area, to be sure."
But on the other side of the door Griffin steps through, the surroundings are almost -- but not quite -- familiar. It's the snug room indeed, but in disarray, and turned about. The wooden cigar store Indian lies on the floor, where the mirror-folk used it as a ram while attacking invisibly. The window is still shattered where Harrison attacked through it. The paper tiger poster is missing from the wall. This must be the door leading to the back room. It's a rather heavy door. Mr. Sullivan often complained about it, but there was little way to fix it, save for replacing it.
The reporter explains to Harrison, and leaves it up to the rabbit to relay if he chooses to, "This door is looking onto the Living Flower Maze from a big house. Pretty posh one, I must say."
Integra makes a noise as if struggling.
The door feels as if it's being forced shut by an unseen pressure greater than just the weight of the back room door. The Gryphon narrowly avoids being bisected by the slamming door -- or losing a wing -- as he's bumped roughly back into the Hall of Doors.
"Sorry!" Integra squeaks, gasping. "I couldn't hold it!"
"Hmmm, not the right door," Griffin notes as he gets back up. "Let's see if Ace is actually lucky this time."
Achilles, hearing the slamming sound, pokes his head back in. "Everything all right in there?" he asks of Harrison.
"Doors are trying to eat Griffin. We should get moving before this door tries to eat us," March says.
Taking Integra's hand, Griffin hurries back towards the voices of the others.
Something about the weight of the door to the garden/house realm seems to suggest that March's suggestion is not without merit. It feels a bit heavier than before.
The reporter grimaces. "He's the Gourmancer, he's supposed to be cooking us things to eat, not being cooked into a thing to eat." He helps to hold the door. "Hurry, Griffin, Integra! Fly for your lives!"
The rocking-horse wobbles more frantically after Integra. "Oh my!" the little girl squeaks.
"Hurry it up, I'm not sure how long I can hold this door!" March calls as he leans heavily against the door to hold it open too. He also makes a cursory look at the hinges, seeing if he can pull the pins!
Oh, it's almost as if the door can tell what March is planning. There is most assuredly a force trying to shove the door closed now.
Griffin, Integra and even the Rocking-Nightmare (and Toybox) make it to the door in time. Either Harrison is stronger than he lets on, or maybe the door relented just a bit once it was clear that it was taken seriously. That is, if it's possible characterize a mere DOOR that way.
With a final slam, the door closes, and the glow of the Hall of Doors (and its many, often indistinct light sources) fades under the door gap. The door is clearly different on the other side -- just a back door to a nice country house in a fenced-in yard that happens to connect to a GIGANTIC FLOWER MAZE. No, this isn't really that ordinary of a house after all.
The card looks at the door, then tries the handle cautiously. "That's strange... Not at all like what happened with the Sheepkeeper's," he says. "But, assuming this is the right place, maybe we can figure out what started Alice on her path."
"Well, at least nothing is laying in wait to cook and eat us," Harrison says, feeling all the better for being out of that crazy place. "Quite a floral place, too. Now, where are we, exactly?" The hare slinks to the side of the house and peers around it. Maybe the front door has a name plate ... so if it is safe enough to get to...
The sun shines down brightly. There isn't even a HINT of snow on the ground. Curiously, all those heavy winter clothes didn't seem a burden at all in the Hall of Doors, but it's stifling to try to waddle about in them now.
"Do we have to enter the house?" Griffin wonders. "I certainly do not want to deal with another maze."
Achilles fans his brow, then starts to take off his overcoat. "I wonder if it's always sunny in this part of the country? Certainly the Flowers would prefer it that way."
To the south of the house is the front gate, and beyond that a fairly ordinary road ... except for the distinct LACK of any other household roads branching off from it. Rather, it looks as if this is the ONLY house to speak of in the whole area, and it doesn't look like the sort of house that would stand on its own in a vast tract of wilderness. It's not really a manor, after all.
"Now... where did Alice go from here?" Griffin asks and rubs his forehead, trying to remember.
"I already have a fut coat, I don't need two here," March mutters as he pulls his coat and gloves off to store them in his travel bag.
To the west (or what seems like west) is a vast range of mountains that rises sharply, quickly dispelling any notions of this being the English countryside (as if the castle and giant chess pieces or whispering giant flowers didn't give that away already). The mountain range drops down a bit to the south, and a long winding road leads into the wooded pass.
To the east is the distant white castle/city with its squared off proportions, and its many buildings that look suspiciously like chess pieces on a ridiculous scale.
Taking a moment, Griffin helps Integra with her winter coat before taking his own off.
Considering these navigational clues, Achilles mentally marks them as being indeed at the Looking-Glass House. Pretty amazing odds, really.
The reporter turns to Harrison. "Think you can get us into the house?" he asks.
To the distant south is ... haze. Haze and forest. It doesn't look inviting. To the closer south would be the house. The windows have been boarded over, and the back door is solidly locked. There are the sounds of tromping boots in the front yard, and it sounds as if the house itself is occupied.
"Depends on how you want me to try? I could charm the residents ... or try to pick the door?" Harrison asks. He slinks about a bit, seeing if he can spy who might be inside through the boarded windows.
"I'll check the upper windows," the gryphon says, and takes to the air.
Inside, Harrison can make out a number of individuals in red. No, scratch that. They ARE red.
They appear to be Chessmen, and heavily armed. Despite this having the appearance of a normal house in the countryside, inside it looks as if the place has been heavily garrisoned, with defenses set up, weapons racks, and a distinct lack of common knickknacks that one might expect in a normal residence.
The reporter pauses, as the sound of boots reaches him. He goes toward the side of the house where Harrison is and peers over at them. "Don't alert them to our presence yet," he suggests. "We want a quiet look inside the house so we can find clues, even if they do live here, they might argue about our definition of clues. And I'd say there's a good chance these are invaders."
"Oh dear," Harrison mutters as he slinks away from the window. "The Red Queen's entourage is here," he tells the others quietly once he has slinked back to them.
The card peers thoughtfully around the corner. "If we wait for nightfall, they should be mostly asleep, then we'd only have to deal with their patrols."
"Of course the wrinkle in that is, we'd have to stay out of sight until nightfall... And if it's always sunny here, it might never be night," Achilles points out as he follows the rabbit back to the others.
"INTRUDER!" someone calls out. "IN THE AIR! ARCHERS!"
"I think it may be time to run," Harrison notes.
Achilles looks up at this. "Well, we're in a bad spot. Try to break in the house and find a hiding spot or run for the maze?"
"Maze. The house is crawling with chessmen. It has been converted to a garrison," March says.
Achilles looks at the upper floor, where there must have been a sentry on duty who spotted Griffin. "They must be planning to invade the White Lands, but how did they get here?" He tries to think fast.
A group of Red Pawn archers rushes around the corner of the house, then takes position and fires a hail of arrows up at the Gryphon. The Gryphon manages to avoid most of them, but one of them strikes home.
Fortunately, it's not as bad as it looked. The arrow is just wedged within the Gryphon's feathers, and didn't actually hit any actual meat or skin. It shakes free with a wing-beat.
More Pawns come rushing around the other side of the house, but with the greater distance they have to cover, they haven't time to loose any more arrows just yet. Some horse-headed Knights hop along as well, and behind them, lumbering and struggling to catch up, are the huge and heavily-armored Rooks.
"There are more!" one shouts. "Sound the alarm!" A trumpet blares. "We're under attack!"
Achilles bangs the door with the handle of his brolly. "Make sure you put the bomb where they'll never find it, Fawkes," he stage-whispers, trying to make sure his voice is loud enough to be heard by the pawns. Louder, he yells up to Griffin and Integra, "Let's get a move on, we've got what we came for! Move, move, move!" and turns to flee toward the maze.
"Awrk!" Griffin squawks. "Stand down! We aren't attacking you!" he claims, and dives to get between Integra and the approaching soldiers. "I'm just here to take your picture!"
"UNCLE PAISLEY!" Integra shrieks, only seeing the arrow apparently impale her uncle.
"By the Spirit of Conflict!" a Knight gasps. "They have a Little Girl!" Somehow, the way he says that sounds like a title, or something especially significant.
(And not in a "My, how wrong we've been!" sort of way, either.)
Grabbing up Integra, Griffin runs for the maze as if an army were at his heels.
"Come on, it's a Nutcracker Bomb, and that garrison's a pretty hard nut," Achilles yells at Griffin and Integra. "You don't want to get caught in the explosion!"
By folding in his wings and diving, the Gryphon builds up tremendous speed, which he uses to swoop up Integra, and bear her all the way to the flower maze. He is soon out of sight of the Pawn archers. The rocking horse and its toybox-wagon are technically slower, and yet manage to wobble-gallop into the maze at an impressive speed.
Achilles says to Harrison as they run, "See if you can persuade the flowers to hide us! They live here, they can't want a war on their doorstep tearing up their foliage."
Flowers of all sorts let out gasps and shrieks as the Gryphon flies by. Dog flowers and dog roses bark loudly. A tiger lily roars. Daffodils look baffled. The Gryphon gets a rise out of the roses. The tulips give him some lip. The violets look on the verge of turning violent.
The card sprints for the hedge maze, diving after Integra around the curve of the first wall in sight, so he can get under cover! "Coming through, pardon me, ma'am," he yelps to the flowers in passing.
Harrison salutes Achilles! "On it!" he declares as he heads into the hedge maze. "Ladies, ladies," the hare says as he skids to a halt inside the maze. "There is simply a terrible misunderstanding. We came here through the hall of doors by accident; we're not here to cause any problems. Could you see it in your beautiful hearts to convince the chessmen of this? We don't want any damage to come to this beautiful garden of yours; it would be a terrible crime against beauty itself for any of you to come to harm. Please, help us?" the hare asks of the flowers of the maze. He even bows and takes off his hat; as well as flashes them all a charming smile.
"Ooo-hoo-hoo!" titter some Daisies. "Oh, a Rabbit in the garden ... but such a HANDSOME one!" a Rose murmurs. "Oh my. Isn't he royalty?"
"He is a veritable prince among rabbits," attests Achilles from where he's panting, catching his breath. "Ah, your Highness, perhaps you might suggest they close the garden walls against those enemies of goodness and beauty?"
Out from the foliage, one Rose stands out from the others. Her petals are an icy blue. As she moves, she does not separate from the bushes, but rather seems to have a rather long reach of her roots. The other flowers part and make way for her. Something about her petals has a regal bearing.
"I am Lady Veilchenblau," the blue Rose-woman says, as she slowly glides down, extending one blue-gloved hand toward the Hare. To anyone unaccustomed with the ways of Wonderland, she would look like a woman attired in an elaborate blue bustle, skirts and bonnet, with exceptionally pale skin and blue highlights, borne along by animated plants -- rather than being a Plant herself. She glances to some of the plants, and at once they shuffle about. With a rustling of leaves, the hedges suddenly shift, covering up a part of the path and redirecting it.
Achilles breathes a sigh of relief as the Red Army has been obscured, and hopefully obstructed from casual view. Hopefully they'll be excited enough to start hacking at the garden, confirming their status as enemies. The reporter rolls to his feet and doffs his bowler hat before a clearly refined lady.
March bows deeply; to the point of even dropping down to one knee. "It is an honor to meet you, Milady Veilchenblau," the hare says. "My most sincere apologies for coming into your beautiful hedge and worse, with chessmen at our heels. We mean no harm to anyone; we have just come through the Hall of Doors. When the chessmen saw us, they panicked and attacked .. and then we panicked and ran. We did not wish to being a fight to your hedge, nor cause you any problems. If you will allow us to pass through in peace, I, Haigha, swear to honor any wish you may have of me. My paws are yours to ask of, and we are at your mercy; may it be kind to foolish travellers."
"It would delight me if you would be ever so kind as to introduce yourselves and tell me what brings you to our garden," the Blue Rose says. She gestures, as if to guide Harrison further in and away from the corner -- where even now the hedges are closing in to seal them off from view, as the Red Chessmen continue to press into the flower maze.
As the Chessmen stampede into the nearby, diverted pathway, she holds a gloved finger to her lips, and whispers, "Quietly, of course."
Note to GW: Move last two poses above March's introduction.
Lady Veilchenblau smiles demurely at Harrison's offer, flipping out a fan of petals to partially obscure her face. She just as suddenly snaps it away, and waits a moment, as the sounds of the shouts and stomping of Chessmen subsides a bit -- they seem to have gone elsewhere. "Then you shall join us for tea."
Achilles looks a bit surprised at Harrison's promise. Oh dear, what are we getting ourselves into? "I have the honor of assisting Haigha in his adventures," he introduces himself, self-deprecatingly. "Some call me the Ace of Spades, but among friends, I prefer to be addressed as just 'Ace'."
"I am Haigha, the March Hare, if you will, Milady. My friends are the intelligent, but sometimes flighty Gryphon. He is charged with a great duty, to guard the Young Lady Integra. The other is the Ace of Spades, as he has described himself ... noble and experienced man, well versed in uncovering truth throughout the land," the hare explains in a low voice as he rises. "And we would be honored beyond measure to join you for tea."
"Quite," Griffin agrees, as he tries to track the soldiers by their sounds.
The reporter heaves a breath of relief that they're safe for the moment. Seeing Griffin and Integra back there, trying to convince an outraged army of Red chess pices, rather made his heart twang. "The way they said 'Little Girl' rather worried me," he confides to the Gryphon. "I very much suspect they would have taken her prisoner and killed you on the spot, had you shown any resistance."
"Indeed, but that gives us something extra in our arsenal," Griffin whispers back to Ace. "To whit: we have a lifelike mechanical Little Girl that could be used as a decoy for luring the Chessmen where we want."
The garden itself shuffles to part way, and at last the group finds its way to a large clearing that might or might not have been here before. Garden tiles have been lifted up on vines to form a table, and beds of soft leaves serve as chairs. Trellises line the edges, with clinging Roses and Grapevines gossiping to each other quietly.
Achilles grimaces. "Let's... hold off on that plan for the moment." He looks about as they're brought to tea, with so many roses looking on and the garden maze likely filled with hundreds, perhaps even thousands. "We'd better be on our best manners."
Somehow, Lady Veilchenblau is here as well, despite the reputation for the Flowers of this place to be of the stationary variety. Perhaps she is a Rambling Rose after all. In any case, it would seem that tea leaves are available here and voluntarily offered up for consumption. (How tea is brewed is a mystery, however.) The teacups themselves look eerily plant-like, and it looks like a different variety of pitcher-plant is serving as the teapot.
Achilles pauses, seeing the Rocking Nightmare served a dish too. He leans over and whispers to Harrison, "We should be worried if the fluid level in the horse's dish starts to go down."
The reporter sniffs at the tea, then nods to the others. He sips at it.
Griffin raises his flower-cup, and has a sip as well.
Haigha smiles to the Lady, then lifts his teacup ... and takes a drink. It would be rude to refuse the offer from their hosts; especially since they just saved them from being skewered.
While the others seem to be enjoying their tea after perhaps only momentarily worrying that it might be poisoned, Lady Veilchenblau seems to be very taken with Harrison, frequently asking him questions and, alas, this has the side effect of disrupting his proper enjoyment of such heavenly tea.
And March, aka, Haigha, entertains and answers the questions to the best of his ability. It would be impolite not to; and right now they need allies, not more enemies. It doesn't hurt the Rose is a charming Lady, either.
The reporter listens to the questions with an eye toward guessing what current events they might allude to, but unfortunately the roses around don't seem particularly inclined toward conversation, which means it's catch-as-cat-can.
Griffin makes sure Integra is sipping politely, while wondering how to ask if the flowers know when the Chessmen arrived, or what they are doing. But there's no lull in the conversation between Lady Veilchenblau and her Special Guest, and he isn't sure it would be wise to interrupt or draw her attention.
Lady Vailchenblau giggles quietly (but lady-like) at some pleasantry of Harrison's. At last, though, she seems to sober a bit. "You are a loyal servant of the White King," she says at last, "and it is a shame that he has not been seen in so long, since the Red Chessmen conquered the fair domain of the White. But I fear your bravery may be your undoing if you keep testing the vigilance of the Red Army." She shakes her head sadly. "We are fortunate that the Red Chessmen fear these unfamiliar places. I am told that they have already left the maze by several directions -- they have been dispersed and lost by the disorienting pathways. Left goes right, and right goes left, and forward is back, as you well know."
Achilles blinks. "Conquered?! The entire domain?" he bursts out.
Lady Veilchenblau gives the Card a glance at his outburst. "A stranger from the Monarchy of Hearts, I suppose. Our affairs are little concern of theirs, after all."
"My apologies, but I had hoped--" The reporter holds his hat over his chest. "This is terribly sad news to me, milady."
"We.. heard no mention of such in Riverside," Griffin notes. "Do they hold the City of Charity itself?"
"Much is in disarray as of late," March agrees as he looks into his teacup. "Too much. And now all the rumors of a new Queen Alice as well. Why, it is almost enough to drive one Mad." He shakes his head and tsks.
The Blue Rose shakes her head. "The Red King slumbers, and the White King ... well, it is whispered that he is no more. His whereabouts -- if still in the land of the living -- are unknown. The lands of the White are conquered by the Red, but the Red Queen has little interest in involving herself too much. The White Queen still sits on the throne in Charity, but only as a figurehead now."
Griffin whispers to Achilles, "If the Chessmen are scattered, should we try to search the House before they can find their way back to it?"
Achilles gives Harrison a look. So that's why the White Knight never got any response, he thinks to himself. He whispers back to Griffin, "Are you really anxious to get caught by their returning soldiers?"
"But I have heard through the Grapevine," the Blue Rose continues (gesturing toward the gossipy fruity vines), "that the Monarchy of Hearts isn't much different. The King of Hearts is nowhere to be seen, whispered to be dead, beheaded like so many others. Now that he is gone, there are no pardons. But the darkest whispers of all are that the Queen of Hearts and Red Queen are themselves only puppets answering to a Queen even above them." She nods to March. "Queen Alice, as you say."
"No, I can't say that I have any such urge," Griffin whispers back. "But you are the curious one. Do you think there'd be anything to find that would lead us to Alice?"
The reporter rubs his (papery) chin thoughtfully. "Though there might be a way..." He tilts his head toward the Blue Rose as she continues to speak. To Griffin he whispers, "Likely, but the fact it's so heavily defended means they're protecting it."
"Worrisome and worrisome. From what I hear this Queen Alice is nothing like The Alice. She, she was a kind girl. The stories I hear of this new queen are anything but," Harrison admits. "Has anyone tried to find the White King? Or failing that, the Red King? There is always a small chance they may yet live. Why, we were visiting the White Knight just the other day."
"By why would they be, if there was nothing to protect?" Griffin notes to the card.
Achilles nods at the Griffin's observation... But listens in on Lady Vielchenblau and Harrison's conversation. Harrison is doing a fine job of questioning her.
"Kindness is of little interest to many among the Chessmen," Lady Veilchenblau responds, sighing. "After all, Conflict is their way of life. Conquest and destruction are perfectly fine, just so long as the basic rules of chivalry are followed -- and those shift with the times. As for the White King, of course his agents have been looking. You are not the only servant of the King to be looking for him, dear Haigha. But I confess that my concerns are mostly with my own garden. Until now, it has been largely left unmolested; the Red Army knows that we have no interest in leaving our comfortable beds."
Daring to address the Lady, Griffin asks, "I.. I don't suppose the house became guarded around the time the White King vanished, My Lady?"
"And I am truly sorry for bringing the focus of the Chessmen upon your garden; and I will do what I can to remedy that," March insists. "And ... forgive me if I am wrong in this thought, but has something else happened recently with the Chessmen at your borders? It pains me to think that they may have dared mar this beautiful place."
"They're clearly protecting something they deem of great importance," Achilles suggests. "It could well be they're holding a prisoner, far from the fields of Charity."
"The Chessmen have left this place well enough alone," Lady Veilchenblau says. "They took the Looking-Glass House as they overran the White Lands. It is, after all, home to one of the stable passages to the Real World, and one of the possible places in which Alice may make her prophesied return ... that is, if you are not one of those who believes she has returned already to rule. But other problems have beset us. You see, we have awaited one who would come to us as well -- a Gardener. The Flowers were all aflutter when there came not one, but TWO Gardeners."
Lady Veilchenblau claps her blue-gloved hands together. Some Flowers look nervously to each other, and then she nods to them grimly. They shuffle about. Vines part, and a large shrubbery is brought by crawling creepers up to the table.
March sips from his tea as he watches the shrubbery come forth. His left ear tilts and twists a bit.
The shrubbery is not some wild plant. Rather, it has been trimmed and cut into the shape of a girl in a dress in the middle of a pirouette. It's rather skillful work, really.
Achilles looks worried. "I have a bad feeling about this," he whispers to Harrison down the table.
"That used to be one of my attendants," Lady Veilchenblau says.
There are gasps and sobs among the crowd of Flowers along the edge of the clearing.
"What happened?" March asks, horrified at the prospect that a Plant was made into plant.
"Indeed, this is most.. unnatural," Griffin has to say. "These Gardeners.. are they a pair? Like sisters?"
The reporter card gets up to approach the shrubbery and inspect its features. If he's right, it should look like one of the Mary twins, carving their identity into the Maze.
"There is a part of the Garden into which those whose roots are not firmly planted dare not go, and those who remain would rather flee. The hedges are well-trimmed ... but --" Lady Veilchenblau breaks off, looking to Griffin. "Yes. It is as you say. They are Mary and Mary, and they are quite contrary."
"Tweedles, I imagine?" the Gryphon asks next.
Lady Veilchenblau nods solemnly. "Among her accomplices are the Silver Bell, a swarm of Cockle Shells, and the Pretty Maids of One Row."
March rubs the top of his fuzzy nose. "Do you wish for us to try and stop these Gardeners from damaging your land any further?" the hare asks of the Blue Lady.
"With your connections, and your travels," the Blue Rose says, turning to Harrison, "it is my hope that you might bring word of our troubles to some Knight Errant -- someone who might fight to rid us of these false Gardeners, before they Trim again."
Achilles glances over to Harrison at the mention of 'Knight Errant'.
"Milady, I would be honored to help you in any way I can," the Hare says. "Even if it meant facing them myself."
"The more of her chosen courtiers we remove, the more Alice may be weakened," Griffin suggests quietly. "On the other hand.. they are.. well... ladies.."
"Who need to have their egoes trimmed down to size," Achilles says, turning from the auto-topiarical shrubbery.
"You are most generous and brave," Lady Veilchenblau says. "It will be our pleasure to help ease your way through the Garden, so that you needn't be troubled by its more peculiar effects upon those who try to navigate the maze. The Red Army will not trouble you within these hedges."
Achilles catches Griffin's eyes. He whispers to the gryphon, "Maybe you should ask them to look after Integra while we're going there... If we don't make it, they can send Integra to the White Knight for help and reinforcements."
"Integra, would you like to stay here with the Lady while we.. tend to some weeds?" Griffin asks his niece.
"Brave, or just as Mad as a March Hare," March quips, raising his glass. "And just one who cannot bear to see a Lady in distress. I will discuss this with my allies and I believe we can come up with a solution to your most vexing problem."
Integra seems utterly taken with the garden of talking Flowers. "Oh, yes, yes, I promise to be no trouble at all, Uncle!" She takes another sip from her tea, extending her pinky, and doing her best to be very proper.
"You're such a good girl, Integra," Griffin says, and leans over to whisper, "And do remember to watch for fairies. This seems like a good garden to find them in, after all."
Integra nods repeatedly. "The Grapevines say these are Fairy Teacups," she whispers excitedly.
"I think we'll need a little time and space to work out a proper solution," says Achilles, nodding at Harrison. "And someone to tell us what you know about the Contrary Maries' minions. And, ah... Props. But mark my words, once we have a plan hammered out, it's a surefire thing that they'll be on their way out of your maze, crying all the way."
Griffin clucks his beak approvingly to the girl, and turns his attention to the others. "We aren't without out our own gardening tools, after all."